2238 replies to this topic

[The Dove]

Granted...but you are forced to take a number ticket to have your wish granted along with thousands of others in line who have difficulty in making up their minds on what their wish should be.

I wish I could have been a guest at Felix and Della's wedding in the Bahamas in Licence To Kill..

[Pussfeller]

Granted, but you overdo it at the open bar and vomit in the pool, earning yourself the nickname "Chunderball". As a result of your behavior, you are not invited to Della's buccaneer-themed funeral.

I wish Pam Bouvier had been played by Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

[The Dove]

Granted...but the stipulation is that her Seinfeld co-star Jason Alexander MUST be cast as Ernst Stavro Blofeld in a remake of For Your Eyes Only...I can just picture him uttering that "Stainless Steel delicatessen" line...

I wish I had a bottle of Dom Perignon '53, Bond's preferred champagne from Dr. No, just now!

[Jaws0178]

Granted, but you are forced to drink it at a temperature above 38 degrees Fahrenheit, at which time, Sean Connery comes and beats you with his slipper from Dr. No screaming that you are a tarantula.

i wish i was a certified James Bond expert.

[Pussfeller]

Granted, but your certification comes from the Pensacola Off-Ramp Bible College, and is printed on a stale tortilla.

I wish I shared Bond's bootmaker.

[Jaws0178]

Granted, but as you find out, Bonds bootmaker has a very bad habit of testing boots by shoving somewhere very painful.

I wish I hadn't eaten my certificate from the Pensacola Off-Ramp Bible College. It gave me a stomachache.

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted. Your mother eats it.

I wish I hadn't seen that pic of that girl with that guy. Make me feel it

[Jaws0178]

Granted, you saw this picture instead:

http://upload.wikime.../Zardoz_zed.jpg

Ok, I wish I hadn't actually had to see the picture in order to copy it.

[Goodnight]

Granted, but you will be blind for the rest of your life.


I wish it was November 2012 right now!

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! But due to yet more financial issues and flawed economic climate leading to Union Strikes, Sony Pictures pulled out of releasing 'Skyfall' with half the cast up in arms, and thus the film, and the James Bond series, are yet again on hold 'indefinately'. Michael G Wilson and Barbara Broccoli are "debating the future of the franchise with a statement expected soon".


I wish I could design the next James Bond teaser trailer with the EON team!

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted. But you have to design it in Windows 2000 with Windows Movie Maker, which freezes all the time.

I wish NEVER forget my town maps guide at the office again.

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! You will never forget it again at the office, you will want to take it and you reach for it...but you will always forget which friend borrowed it last!

I wish I had a Blu-Ray player for the James Bond 50th Anniversay Blu-Ray release!

[Eric Stromberg]

Granted! You will never forget it again at the office, you will want to take it and you reach for it...but you will always forget which friend borrowed it last!

I wish I had a Blu-Ray player for the James Bond 50th Anniversay Blu-Ray release!

Granted. You get your Blu-Ray player but Amazon sends you the Pee-Wee Herman Ultimate Collection by mistake. Enjoy

I wish Casino Royale had starred Sean Connery.

[The Dove]

Granted..but due to the alteration in the Bond timeline with Connery starring in Casino Royale, Timothy Dalton stars in Dr. No, Pierce Brosnan stars in Goldfinger, George Lazenby stars in Die Another Day, Roger Moore stars in On Her Majesty's Secret Service and Daniel Craig stars in A View To A Kill..

I wish I could be the lucky person who gets hired to record the theme song for "Skyfall"

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! But due to long-standing contractual obligations with Sony Pictures and Sony Records, you will share the booth with Jay-Z collaborating for the new Bond theme song 'Skyfall', and it will only be available via download. And Jay-Z demands his name appears first in the credit listing.


I wish I was James Bond, just for a day!

[Pussfeller]

Granted, but that day just happens to be the day of the carpet-beater.

I wish I had an office like General Gogol's.

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted, but that day just happens to be the day of the carpet-beater.

Ha! Touche Pussfeller.


Granted! But as you wanted the office, you get Gogol's office as it stands...smelly, dark, dank and a ruin of what is formerly was. The Cold War is over and so is this office. Only rubble lies in place of a nice big table and a smashed video screen is in tatters. And Rubelvitch's purple suede boots lie desolate amongst the weeds growing.


I wish Bond managed to serve around Vesper in his Aston Martin DBS and NOT barrel-roll it 8 times over!

[Eric Stromberg]

Granted, but that day just happens to be the day of the carpet-beater.

Ha! Touche Pussfeller.


Granted! But as you wanted the office, you get Gogol's office as it stands...smelly, dark, dank and a ruin of what is formerly was. The Cold War is over and so is this office. Only rubble lies in place of a nice big table and a smashed video screen is in tatters. And Rubelvitch's purple suede boots lie desolate amongst the weeds growing.


I wish Bond managed to serve around Vesper in his Aston Martin DBS and NOT barrel-roll it 8 times over!

Granted. But as Vesper and Bond drive away from the scene, the CIA mistakes the DBS as a Quantum getaway car and uses a drone to kill them both. Series over...

I wish Tiffany Case would put that bikini back on and come and see me for a cup of tea.

[Pussfeller]

Granted, but keep in mind she hasn't worn that bikini in forty years, and all she wants to talk about are her grandchildren.

I wish J. W. Pepper had appeared in every Roger Moore film.

[Eric Stromberg]

Granted, but keep in mind she hasn't worn that bikini in forty years, and all she wants to talk about are her grandchildren.

I wish J. W. Pepper had appeared in every Roger Moore film.

Granted! But in order to accomplish this, the writers make J.W. Pepper Bond's boss, M. He spends most of the movie calling 007 "boy" and sending him on missions for cigars and bourbon.

I wish James Bond could next be played by Tim Tebow

[Pussfeller]

Granted. His reports to M are frequently intercepted.

I wish Bond would go to Australia.

[The Dove]

Granted..but it turns out that 007 must face Paul Hogan as Crocodile Dundee as his nemesis down under.

I wish that I had a copy of the Skyfall script in my hands right now!

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted...but that copy will self destruct in 5 seconds.


I wish that Madonna comes back and sings the new 'Skyfall' theme!

[The Dove]

(Oh dear..LOL) Granted, but the stipulation is that she must duet with Lady Gaga on the title song...as a result due to numerous breakdowns and catfights during the recording session, which cause the film release to be delayed, EON decide to fire both Madonna and Lady Gaga and just go with an instrumental theme to Skyfall.

I wish that Maude Adams would make another appearance in a Bond film..ala Tsai Chin appearing in "You Only Live Twice" and then in "Casino Royale"

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted. You manage to see Maud in a nice cameo role during 'Skyfall'...as Bond is stalking around London city, Maud is seen talking to another lady in front of a poster reading 'Octopussy's Circus In Town', faded from years of decay but you see it clear. Bond casts his eyes at her, smiles, and continues. Yes...it's that tacky, but thank you Maud Adams.

I wish that all the 22 Bond films are re-released in the cinemas this year at some stage!

[The Dove]

Granted...but the unfortunate part is that at EVERY ONE of the 22 screenings you have the misfortune of sitting in a theater packed with Bond novices who don't know their Sean Connery's from their Pierce Brosnans etc.. and thus hear comments like "From Russia With Love...that was Pierce Brosnan, right??" *face palm*..

I wish that Ian Fleming had lived long enough to see Daniel Craig as Bond..

[Pussfeller]

Granted, but at the press conference for Casino Royale he makes several unfortunate remarks, and the film is boycotted by the NAACP, GLAAD, Greenpeace, the Anti-Defamation League, the ASPCA, the CIA, the NFL, PETA, and the Ancient Order of Hibernians. Omega and Sony pull out, Daniel Craig flees to a Tibetan monastery, and Fleming goes on to produce a Tony-winning Broadway adaptation of State of Excitement: Impressions of Kuwait.

I wish Fleming had written a document entitled "One Thousand James Bond Titles", so that the producers could always use a genuine Fleming title.

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! Instead of 'Skyfall' we now have Bond 23 as 'The Smoking Gun Of Red Handed Men'

I wish I could meet Daniel Craig!

[elizabeth]

Granted. He dies before you get there.

I wish I could meet Donald O'Connor!

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted. He dies before you get there.

I wish I could meet Donald O'Connor!

Well that's a corrupted wish if ever I heard one!


Yours is granted...but Donald is suffering from pneumonia due to all the Singin' In The Rain, and is in no mood to talk or go over the good times, and he's just sits in bed with a warm towel on his head.



I wish that Timothy Dalton could have done at least 1 more James Bond film.