2238 replies to this topic

[elizabeth]

Granted. Bond gets a Bug.

I wish I had more food.

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! But...*sniff* it's gone off! It was left in the fridge too long...! But you either have to eat it, or leave it and go hungry...


I was I could be an extra in a James Bond film!

[Eric Stromberg]

Granted! But...*sniff* it's gone off! It was left in the fridge too long...! But you either have to eat it, or leave it and go hungry...


I was I could be an extra in a James Bond film!

Granted. The filmmakers think you are the spitting image of one of the henchmen, and so decide to launch you and your getaway stunt car off an elevated freeway in Shanghai. The Bond franchise thanks you for volunteering and for your sacrifice!

I wish Skyfall had a midget and machine gun action scene...

[glidrose]

Granted! But...*sniff* it's gone off! It was left in the fridge too long...! But you either have to eat it, or leave it and go hungry...


I was I could be an extra in a James Bond film!

Granted. The filmmakers think you are the spitting image of one of the henchmen, and so decide to launch you and your getaway stunt car off an elevated freeway in Shanghai. The Bond franchise thanks you for volunteering and for your sacrifice!

I wish Skyfall had a midget and machine gun action scene...

Granted, but the producers splice together TMWTGG and TND and release that because they forgot to put film in the camera when shooting Skyfall.

I wish Joe Don Baker was my love child.

[Eric Stromberg]

Granted! But...*sniff* it's gone off! It was left in the fridge too long...! But you either have to eat it, or leave it and go hungry...


I was I could be an extra in a James Bond film!

Granted. The filmmakers think you are the spitting image of one of the henchmen, and so decide to launch you and your getaway stunt car off an elevated freeway in Shanghai. The Bond franchise thanks you for volunteering and for your sacrifice!

I wish Skyfall had a midget and machine gun action scene...

Granted, but the producers splice together TMWTGG and TND and release that because they forgot to put film in the camera when shooting Skyfall.

I wish Joe Don Baker was my love child.

Hmmmmmm...kinky! I like your style.

Granted. Joe Don Baker is indeed your love child...but it turns out the mum's Whoopi Goldberg, and you had to bang her hundreds of times to get her knocked up!

I wish Daniel Craig would return the girl to me that he stole and then married

[Pussfeller]

Granted, but you must first guess his real name, Danielstiltzcraig. In his rage, he drives his right foot into the ground, seizes his left foot with both hands, and rips himself in two.

I wish Patrick McGoohan had played a Bond villain.

[glidrose]

Granted, but you must first guess his real name, Danielstiltzcraig. In his rage, he drives his right foot into the ground, seizes his left foot with both hands, and rips himself in two.

I wish Patrick McGoohan had played a Bond villain.

Granted. He played the unseen Blofeld. Woody Allen did the voiceover.

I wish Captain Tightpants had a less daft moniker.

[Mr. Blofeld]

Granted; it is "StopHarrassingMeGlidrose". :-P


I wish I had a pickle for every dollar I found on the sidewalk.

[Pussfeller]

Granted, but they're deep-fried pickles, and your cholestrol skyrockets.

I wish I were in the land of cotton.

[glidrose]

Granted, but they're deep-fried pickles, and your cholestrol skyrockets.

I wish I were in the land of cotton.

Wish NOT granted. Otherwise I'd have to make a politically incorrect comment per your moniker and avatar that will raise Jim's ire and get me banned.

I wish... I knew what to wish for. Damn, this game's hard.

[Pussfeller]

(By "land of cotton" I was referring to Egypt, of course.)

Granted, you think of something to wish for, but some smart-aleck comes along and subverts that wish in a humorous fashion, thus spoiling everything.

I wish James Bond's middle name was "Shlomo".

[glidrose]

(By "land of cotton" I was referring to Egypt, of course.)

Granted, you think of something to wish for, but some smart-aleck comes along and subverts that wish in a humorous fashion, thus spoiling everything.

Hold on, that's the whole point, n'est pas?

I wish James Bond's middle name was "Shlomo".

Granted, but he'd look something like these guys. Oh vey, geriatric Roger Moore circa 1985 looking very kosher now.

I wish this game hadn't gotten so tedious.

Edited by glidrose, 25 January 2012 - 11:56 PM.

[Eric Stromberg]

(By "land of cotton" I was referring to Egypt, of course.)

Granted, you think of something to wish for, but some smart-aleck comes along and subverts that wish in a humorous fashion, thus spoiling everything.

Hold on, that's the whole point, n'est pas?

I wish James Bond's middle name was "Shlomo".

Granted, but he'd look something like these guys. Oh vey, geriatric Roger Moore circa 1985 looking very kosher now.

I wish this game hadn't gotten so tedious.

Granted. But of course the game gets so good that you sell your entire 007 memorabilia collection to finance playing it 24/7!

I wish Bambi and Thumper would parachute into my bedroom

[Mr. Blofeld]

Granted; it's the animated characters, who nuzzle you to death.


I wish I had as cool a boss as Bernard Lee's M.

[The Dove]

Granted..but unlike Bernard Lee's M, your boss refuses to cover for your from higher authority by "sending you on leave" ala Moonraker or OHMSS when you wish to go against the orders of the higher powers.

I wish that I won a competition where I could dine and date any two Bond girls of my choice! (Can't wait to see what the response to this one is gonna be! lol)

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! But did you read the competition small print?

*Due to over-whelming demand and current obligations from EON Productions, the competition winner will be allowed a pre-booked dinner and drink for 4 hours at any local Pizza Express restaurant to be taken before 30/08/12. The winner will be able to choose two accompanying ladies from the James Bond film franchise of their choice as advertised, but this must be understood there is a limit to the meaning of "Of Your Choice." Participating actresses have been confirmed as Eunice Gayson, Tania Mallett, Molly Peters, Tsai Chin, Lola Larson, Madeline Smith, Felicity York, Olga Bisera, Emily Bolton, Lynn-Holly Johnson, Fiona Fullerton, Grace Jones, Alison Doody, Virginia Hey, Priscilla Barnes, Serena Scott Thomas and Rachel Grant. Please note minders will be present at all times and there will be a small charge for requested fan signatures, kisses on the cheek only and bottom squeezing.


I wish that Olga Kurylekno came back as Camille in a future Bond film!

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted. She returns in the Tom Cruise/Quentin Tarantino unnoficial production "Never Say Never Again 2", released in 2023 starring a 70 year old Pierce Brosnan as James Bond. Invisible car included! xD

I wish I could travel to London and buy every Bond stuff cheaper than in my country!

[Pussfeller]

Granted, but later you discover that the world's cheapest Bond mechandise is sold in Uruguay.

I wish I had Bond's espresso machine.

[The Dove]

Granted...but as it's an "experimental model" designed by Q, it malfunctions during one of your dinner parties and instead of serving a delicious espresso to your guests, they get taste-less, coffee colored hot water while the machine spits the white froth all over the kitchen counter.

I wish I had been on the guest list to Gustav Graves' knighting ceremony at Buckingham Palace..

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! You're sat right at the back of the Abbey and can only see the top of the Queen's head and can't hear what's going on and have to put up with the ramblings of some elderly man talking about what a stupid name 'Gustav Graves' is and talking about how things have changed in his day since the end of the second World War and people being knighted.


I wish that Roger Moore appears in 'Skyfall' in some legendary, critically acclaimed cameo role.

[Mr. Blofeld]

Granted; it's in drag as May, Bond's maid. :-P


I wish this damnable rain would stop, so I could go somewhere...

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! No rain...you get snow instead and it blocks you in!


I wish the James Bond theme is used in 'Skyfall' in the film itself.

[The Dove]

Granted...but sadly as with Die Another Day and Tomorrow Never Dies, the bond theme occurs during an action sequence where the noise of gunfire, explosions and racing engines drowns out the "twanging guitar" of the Bond theme.

I wish...EON and Sam Mendes would STOP teasing us with all these "Clapperboard" pics and release some REAL Skyfall set pictures..NOW!

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! You get a picture of someone with their back to the camera holding a machine gun in a dark warehouse, and Sam Mendes is seen in the background pointing at the floor. And it's official. Woo.


I wish Take That sing the new theme for 'Skyfall' (lol!)

[Pussfeller]

Granted, and they impress the producers so much that they are made "part of the Bond family", and are invited back to record every Bond theme for the next thirty-seven years.

I wish Bond would fully revert to Moore-era levels of promiscuity.

[thecasinoroyale]

Granted! But because of this and the inccreasing levels it entails, Daniel Craig drops out of the series after 'Skyfall' and so Alan Cumming is enlisted as James Bond 007 for the next 5 films as a somewhat promiscuous secret agent, slighty nerdy with technology and full of innuendo!


I wish that James Bond lives forever!

[The Dove]

Granted...but the unfortunate thing is that eventually all original ideas for Bond films will dry up and thus force the great-great-great-great (etc..) grandchildren of the EON producers to remake all the films several times over. By the time the 17th remake of Dr No gets made, everything which made the original films great has long been lost in the mists of time.. A new Bond theme takes over, the gunbarrel has mutated into some freaky 40thcentury laser gun barrel and such.

I wish that Desmond Llewellyn could have lived long enough to play Q in a scene where Bond actually returns one of his gadgets in tact and undamaged for once! LOL.

[Jaws0178]

I hate to corrupt this, cause confidentially, so do I

Ok, granted, but Bond bringing it back causes poor Q to have a heart attack right there in the lab. Bond feels so guilty about it that he immediately tenders his resignation to MI-6 thus ending the series.

I wish my daughters package wasn't stuck in Cerritos, CA.

[elizabeth]

Granted. It's stuck in Antarctica.

I wish I didn't have class at 1 so I could watch The Devil Makes Three with Gene Kelly.

[glidrose]

Granted. It's stuck in Antarctica.

I wish I didn't have class at 1 so I could watch The Devil Makes Three with Gene Kelly.

Granted. The school expels you. You spend the rest of your life on the freeway screaming at traffic.

I wish liberals weren't so sanctimonious.