2238 replies to this topic

[Monkeyfoahead]

Granted. You now get 30x more taxes taken out of your check.


I wish i was motivated today.

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted. You're so motivated that you can't even sleep.

I wish that girl wouldn't have started a relaionship

[Professor Pi]

Granted. But on her first date with you she says her previous boyfriend was Charlie Sheen.

I wash I wasn't in debt.

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted. But on her first date with you she says her previous boyfriend was Charlie Sheen.

That wouldn't be that bad after all...

I wash I wasn't in debt.

Granted. You haven't got one single debt, but every friend asks you for money, you lend them, and you end pennyless!

[Goodnight]

Nicolas don't forget to wish for something lovie


I wish my car could clean itself

[Conlazmoodalbrocra]

Granted, but it does it while you're driving!

I wish I had a nice girlfriend.

[elizabeth]

Granted. Surprise!

I wish that my mom could pick me up at 10 AM tomorrow for Spring Break.

[Professor Pi]

Granted. In her bikini.

I wish my boss weren't a lying weasel.

[Conlazmoodalbrocra]

Granted, they're far too brutally honest.

I wish I had a decent job.

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted. But you feel sad for me because I couldn't find a decent one either

I wish Cristina Kirchner would suffer from stammering in one of her many public speeches just as King George VII.

[Goodnight]

Granted, but everyone feels sorry for her and her popularity soars.


I wish I had the courage to ask out the boy I like.

[Conlazmoodalbrocra]

Granted, you ask him out but he turns you down.

I wish everyone liked Quantum of Solace.

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted, but the film is never released on DVD or Blu Ray and all the prints and press screeners are missing after the first showing, so nobody can't see the film more than once.

I wish I would be stronger and look into the future instead of drinking the six Vesper martinis that are keeming me awake.

[Conlazmoodalbrocra]

Granted, you look to the future but someone shoots you just as you start to get happy about it

I wish cars didn't take so long to wash!

[Goodnight]

Granted but they get dirty again twice as quick as normal.


I wish I wasn't so stressed right now!

[Conlazmoodalbrocra]

Granted, you're so relaxed that you keep falling asleep

I wish I wasn't so lazy

[elizabeth]

Granted, you don't go to class and fail!!

I wish my camera's memory card had enough room so I could get through the Sedgwicke Hotel in my Ghostbusters walkthrough.

[Eric Stromberg]

Granted, you don't go to class and fail!!

I wish my camera's memory card had enough room so I could get through the Sedgwicke Hotel in my Ghostbusters walkthrough.

Granted. But there is now so much extra room on your card that there's room for an entire spirit to infiltrate it; you get slimed later in the day while trying to use the bathroom.

I wish Hollywood would cease re-making all the movies I enjoyed as a teenager in the 80s.

[Goodnight]

Granted, they now remake the films that you hated.



I wish this task of stepping up my fitness wasn't so mentally and physically hard.

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted. It's easy but now cooking is difficult for you and all your relatives so you starve!

I wish (former president) Duhalde and (Buenos Aires Mayor) Macri would join in a common party for this years election so they can defeat for once and for all to Cristina Kirchner and every member of her government!

[elizabeth]

Granted, but Duhalde and Macri suddenly become couch potatoes.

I wish I had something to do.

[TheREAL008]

Granted, you can do my laundry. No bleach please.

I wish I had a puppy.

[Eric Stromberg]

Granted, you can do my laundry. No bleach please.

I wish I had a puppy.

Granted, you get a pair of puppies but it turns out they are sweater puppies, and you are an outcast for having grown a nice healthy set of female breasts on your chest.

I wish 007 would stop calling my house and leaving threatening messages on my answering machine.

[xboy]

Granted, now he comes by to give you chocolates, roses and he likes you now. i wish i had the perfect idea for a bond fan fiction story.

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted, but you have nowhere to write it and you forget about it.

I wish I could met beautiful girls more often.

[volante]

Granted; it now happens all the time, unfortunately you discover you're gay.

I wish I knew why my pond has gone green

[coco1997]

Granted; the Hulk drowned in there three weeks ago.

I wish I had shoehorn hands.

[Eric Stromberg]

Granted; the Hulk drowned in there three weeks ago.

I wish I had shoehorn hands.

Granted, but your wish granter is a bloody idiot and you end up with Scissorhands instead. Now you're in danger of cutting off your Coco every time you touch yourself.

I wish there wasn't so much corruption on this thread.

[Conlazmoodalbrocra]

Granted, it's now being monitored so fiercely that no one can post anything on it at all!

I wish I was better at revising.

[Nicolas Suszczyk]

Granted. You're now disastrous at creating or whatever you do except revising.

I wish there wasn't such a big price inflation in Argentina.