2152 replies to this topic

[DLibrasnow]

Thanks for the words of inspiration 004

[Matt O'S oo4]

Originally posted by Bryce (003)
004 NEVER EVER would possibly DREAM of breaking ANY traffic laws.....

Your ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!

We just obliterated a Mercedes on a public street with military hardware. I certainly don't see that listed in any of the ordinance volumes provided to us by Q. Not that he ever told to acturally READ them.

Hmmmmm..... there might be something to that. Oh, well....

[i]...and he never drinks and drives. [/B]

We are in to a little bit of a grey area here, 003.

Define DRINK.

[i]Much like myself, he does his drinking first, gets it out of the way, THEN goes driving.[/B]

Usually a good strategy, actually. 003 is quite right. Its so hard to pour quality single malt scotch into Waterford crystal while launching a pair of stinger missles and evading the local authorities.

This job can be SO darn complicated.

Please note the unofficial 00 manual, chapter on Recreation, page 116, subcategory 3 on Chemical Recreation, paragraph 6.

[i]No really....[/B]

Really? No, No, Really, Really!!

[i]*looks for memo on desk*[/B]

003 finds photo of several memebers of the 00-section offering Bryce a "friendly gesture."

004

[Matt O'S oo4]

Originally posted by DLibrasnow
Thanks for the words of inspiration 004

At your service, good sir, anytime.

"Nunc Bebendum Est"

004

[DLibrasnow]

<>

[Bryce (003)]

[quote]Originally posted by Athena007


Yes... you happen to be there with me. Bryce took me to the pub last night (in an attempt to get me away from the stress of this office) for a pint... or two... or three... or

[Matt O'S oo4]

Originally posted by Bryce (003)
Especially since someone (who shall remain nameless) *cough* 004 *cough* never got you to the Tea Room.

I am still waiting for Athena's take on our high speed encounter before we even get to that event. Your post said you were at the pub last night.

We are still on our way to the Tea Room. Have you been there that long? Hmmm... no matter... (drunk) ....

Of course, if the lady still wishes to go there, it is completely up to her.

She is, after all, the lady.

004

[Matt O'S oo4]

Originally posted by DLibrasnow
<>

Please, good sir, do not get discouraged but take heart.

You are very welcome to join in and add your own particular spice to the melee.

All are welcome....

....in the light....

(whoops, sorry....wrong story...)

Blah!

004

[Bryce (003)]

OK All - Play nice. I'm off to the "City by the Bay" this weekend.

*Checks bags goes out to the curb as a '69 Jag pulls up with Miss O'Keefe behind the wheel who plants a kiss on 003*

Airport Luv, and don't spare the horses.

*Jag spins away with stereo blaring*

"If you're going to San Fran-Cisco..."

[Genrewriter]

*Genrewriter steps back into office after taking an eighteen hour coffee break.*

Whew, needed that.

*Looks out the window and sees plume of smoke from 003 and 004's party.*

Ah, another quiet day at the office.

004, you might be interested to know that the car that shot at you belonged to Sir Nigel von Tupperware, no relation to the container manufacturer. Apparently he was despondent after his latest conquest refused to burp him before the main event, if you know what I mean. Anyhow, I found out that he's linked to one of the chaps you two blew away at some point, something about Italy and a venitian blinds warehouse that was being used for nerve gas bombs. I found the guy behind it and since I didn't want to distract you from your drinking, I went over to the guy's house on my coffee break and put two in the back of his head. So, that's been my day. Round of drinks?

[Athena007]

Originally posted by Matt O'S. (oo4)
Your post said you were at the pub last night. We are still on our way to the Tea Room.  Have you been there that long?  Hmmm... no matter... (drunk) ....

Let's just say... we never made it to the tea room because of the chase... then we went back to MI6... and then I went to the pub with Bryce (which is a true story, I actually did)... and so you and me, to the tea room another day, like a rescheduling.

[Matt O'S oo4]

As you wish Miss Athena.

Blah

(Kinda blows the story adding reality to it but, "C'est La Vie")

004 returns to his flat. Reactivates his security systems upon his reentry and notices his computer is running.

Hmm. Checks and discovers a message from G.

Shocking.

TWO rounds?

004

[Genrewriter]

I couldn't find my bazooka.

[Athena007]

Originally posted by Matt O'S. (oo4)
As you wish Miss Athena. Blah (Kinda blows the story adding reality to it but, "C'est La Vie")

I actually really thought we didn't make it to the tea house.

[Genrewriter]

*Enters office after an hour long break with Dr. Warmflash and loads a clip into his .45, stashing it under his desk.*

Occupatonal hazard, M has put me back in the field as an agent. She appreciated my restraint in dealing with your situation, 004.

*Gets up, locks door and heads for his Vanquish.*

Just going out for a quick spin.

[Xenobia]

Originally posted by Bryce (003)


Like Hell miss Suzy Goose.....

*sighs and shakes head*

Am I ever going to live this down?

I was suffering from the shock and awe of the "Pretty Woman" wanna be with the Louis Vuitton luggage. Sue me.

Originally posted by Bryce (003)
As I happened to be at the pub last night, just happened to be, and I considered a Car Bomb (well, I was considering one for the black sedan that was parked in the alley across the street with Yuri and a few goons) and I compared notes with my bartender

I just love how you forget that staple of any bartender "The customer is always right." Don't you think he might have fudged things to keep you amused.

Originally posted by Bryce (003)

There are, in fact, three versions - The TRUE car bomb is done as a shot. Both are fine drinks, but the TRUE one packs a bit more C-4.

Never has there been a more confusing word than "true." Define oh great 003 what "true" and "truth" are.

Originally posted by Bryce (003)

Now, knowing what an EXPERIENCED drinker you are,  

I certainly am one now thanks to the shark and wolf.

Originally posted by Bryce (003)
Silly Girl......or is that silly "goose"

Most of the folks here at CBN know that I am a lady. What's taking you so long to figure that out?
-- Xenobia

[Matt O'S oo4]

Originally posted by Athena007


I actually really thought we didn't make it to the tea house.

*Sigh*

Well, you try.

004

[Matt O'S oo4]

Originally posted by Genrewriter
*Enters office after an hour long break with Dr. Warmflash and loads a clip into his .45, stashing it under his desk.*

Occupatonal hazard, M has put me back in the field as an agent.  She appreciated my restraint in dealing with your situation, 004.

*Gets up, locks door and heads for his Vanquish.*

Just going out for a quick spin.

Blah.

Could you use a cohort..er..companion along or do you need solitude?

I think it's time to..."strech our legs" a bit.

You're call.

004

[Genrewriter]

I agree, it is quite a good time to get out and see what we can see. Plus, I've been wanting to try out a version of pool I thought up in the lab one day. All we need to do is provoke some villains into chasing us. Care to begin?

[Matt O'S oo4]

You mind driving?

004

[Genrewriter]

Sure.

*Genrewriter goes out to the motor pool and gets into his Vanquish. He pulls a PPK from the glove compartment and buckles up (safety first, very important).*

Ready when you are, 004.

[Matt O'S oo4]

Very well.

I assume that this vehicle comes with all the "usual refinements."

Any optional extras I should be made aware of as I am "riding shotgun?"

004

[Genrewriter]

It's the normal version, I had a few tricks of my own put in for kicks, dashboard computer, cameras in the fenders. Just don't touch the emergency flasher button. That sets off the self destruct system.

*Genrewriter checks dashboard computer.*

"Looks like Sir Nigel von Tupperware had a few freinds. Let's say hi."

*Devilish smile as Genrewriter slams the car into reverse and peels out of the parking lot.*

G. glances in rearview mirror as three motorcycles and an SUV approach from behind.

"Hmm, let's see who the mystery guest are."

Presses button on dashboard and cameras built into the rear fender take photos of the license plates.

"Yep, von Tupperware's braintrust."

G. slams on the accelerator, two bikes speed up, passing him.

"Damn Sunday drivers."

A gunman in the SUV opens fire with an uzi.

"004, mind taking out that gunman? I just had a coat of paint put on this thing."

[Matt O'S oo4]

"And a fine coat of paint it is.....can't have some oaf with an uzi disturbing the wax finish now can we?

By the way, if you have the opportunity, please record this....I've been wanting to put together a kind of "highlights" reel, as it were. Could be fun in off hours.

Just a second."

004 pull a Beretta 92F from his left side and flips the release, droping out the clip with one smooth move and cathing the falling clip with the other....putting the clip aside and pulling out another on from his inside right jacket pocket, slips it into his weapon and chambers a shell. (1.3 seconds)

"What ever shall we do with you.....silly goon...."

004 takes aim and fires one round.....its louder than even 004 expected.

A three foot flame extends from the end of 004s 92F and the round hits just left of the mark....and explodes.

The following car careens back and forth, but the driver manages to keep his vehicle on the road.

"Hold steady now."

[Genrewriter]

"Nice shot."

Genrewriter heads after one of the bikes which swerves in and out of traffic. As it goes around an orange VW Bug, Genrewriter rams into him, flipping him over the hood of the car and where he crashes into a mailbox.

"Slugbug orange. Heh, heh, heh."

The cyclist in front fires a gun at the Vanquish but G. presses a button, unleashing the headlight machine guns, exit biker.

Genrewriter swerves onto a freeway and the pursuers follow.

"Care to take out the bikers, 004?"

"Certainly."

"Great, just reach into the back seat and get the bazooka."

[Matt O'S oo4]

"Tha's NOT steady....BAZOOKA?"

004 slowly looks into Genrewriter's back seat and, sure enough....

"Well, I'm glad to see we have the same taste in weapons. Ooookay...thats great. Just a bit bulky for my taste. And a little obvious."

004 thinks..."Let's save that for the car." (smile)

"A moment if you please."

004 leans out the window and double taps the remaining biker with his 92F. The first round takes out the bikers rear tire. The second follows through and into the engine. Both exploding and projecting the rider into the air in front of the Vanquish.

"SERVICE," calls 004

[Genrewriter]

Genrewriter slams trhrough the wreckage and presses auto-drive.

"Hey, watch this!"

Genrewriter grabs his PPK and the .45, leaning out the driver's side window. he fires at one the last biker, shredding his front tire. the biker slams into the retaining wall and is squashed by the SUV as it roars past.

"And for my next miracle..."

Suddenly, the SUV is joined by three more SUV's wuith machine guns mounted on the hoods.

"Jeez, you just can't go a block without a damn fleet of these things popping up."

Genrewriter leans back in as the machine guns open fire.

"Might want to get that bazooka loaded."

Genrewriter spins the car around and fires a rocket into the first SUV, obliterating it in a huge fireball.

"Your serve, 004. Want to toy with them a bit or finish them off?"

[Matt O'S oo4]

"How could you even suggest such a thing? Haven't you ever been fishing my, man?"

With a loaded bazooka at the ready, 004 begins to go to work.

"Let's call that SUV "B" and that one "A" and that one is the one that's not going to the market today...."

004 takes a bead, bears down and fires three rounds into the drivers side windscreen of the annoying little SUV The sound is tremdous for a beretta. (thinking to himself...American cars, you just can't trust them...)

The vehicle explodes and goes off the road, narrowly missing "B" and comsuming a fair amout as cement at the retaining wall. (004 thinks, I'm must say, I'm not looking forward to the paperwork on this one. Ahh, we'll put it in Freeman's in box.)

"Okaay. Time to reel them in. Play time is over."

004 grabs bazooka.

"By the way, that's a very large truck....."

[Genrewriter]

"Yes, it is. And look, there's another one right beside it."

Genrewriter slows down a bit so he's near the driver's side of one of the SUV's.

"Hey, you guys drive like my grandmother!"

004 raises his eyebrow.

"What? It's gonna work!"

Genrewriter speeds up and the remaining SUV's follow. Genrewriter heads for the space in between the trucks, goading the other two. 004 fires rounds into the windscreens.

"Might want to keep your arms in there, 004."

Genrewriter blasts between the tqwo trucks. One SUV tries ther same move but gets stuck. As it does, Genrewriter fires a missile from the rear headlight as the second SUV crashes into the rear of the first. the trucks and the SUV explode in a enormous fireball.

Genrewriter glances in the rearview mirror as the last SUV comes thorugh the flames.

"Problem?"

The last SUV explodes as well.

"I guess not. Wanna stop by the local pub?"

[Matt O'S oo4]

"Veeery good. Pub sounds like just what we could use at this point."

Looking quizzically at Genrewriter.

"But a bit messy, don't you think? Even by our 'standards'?"

004 looks back to see all traffic lanes completely consumed in a 20 foot wall of flame and still falling debris behind them.

Looks deadpan at Genrewriter. "We were NEVER here."

004 replaces the standard glazier rounds into his beretta.

004 unloads the bazooka.

"You probably don't need this loaded until you're acturally going to use it. I would suggest, however, as a matter of course that it be used in a more external setting than a speeding motorway. Hard to shoot and drive, you know."

To the PUB SIR!!! First round is on me. After that, all bets are off.

004

[Genrewriter]

Sounds good to me.

*Calls Dr. Warmflash and sets an appointment for tomorrow.*