270 replies to this topic

[tdalton]

Resident Evil: Retribution - *.

 

As awful as the RE film franchise has been, they have at least been decent enough to sit through at least once. Not this one. This is an absolute mess of a film that makes absolutely no sense. Milla Jovovich is as good as ever, but it doesn't help. The bizarreness of the hundreds of clones and the fact that the story is essentially about Umbrella creating a real-life video game to create a global pandemic, just derail an already teetering franchise. Honestly, I would rank RE 5 as one of, if not the worst film of 2012. F*** you Paul W.S. Anderson.

 

Looks like you made it one film further into the franchise than I did.  They were watchable up to Resident Evil: Extinction, after which they became total crap.  Not surprisingly, this noticeable dip in quality came when they started make the films in 3D.

 

It's a shame that they couldn't make a film series that actually bothered following the game series, even if they only used it as a jumping off point for a different storyline.  Paul W.S. Anderson's Resident Evil franchise is to Capcom's Resident Evil what Roald Dahl's You Only Live Twice screenplay is to Ian Fleming's You Only Live Twice.

[seawolfnyy]

Resident Evil: Retribution - *.

 

As awful as the RE film franchise has been, they have at least been decent enough to sit through at least once. Not this one. This is an absolute mess of a film that makes absolutely no sense. Milla Jovovich is as good as ever, but it doesn't help. The bizarreness of the hundreds of clones and the fact that the story is essentially about Umbrella creating a real-life video game to create a global pandemic, just derail an already teetering franchise. Honestly, I would rank RE 5 as one of, if not the worst film of 2012. F*** you Paul W.S. Anderson.

 

Looks like you made it one film further into the franchise than I did.  They were watchable up to Resident Evil: Extinction, after which they became total crap.  Not surprisingly, this noticeable dip in quality came when they started make the films in 3D.

 

It's a shame that they couldn't make a film series that actually bothered following the game series, even if they only used it as a jumping off point for a different storyline.  Paul W.S. Anderson's Resident Evil franchise is to Capcom's Resident Evil what Roald Dahl's You Only Live Twice screenplay is to Ian Fleming's You Only Live Twice.

I wouldn't quite go that far, but I do see the comparison. I, do agree though, that I wish they had at least vaguely followed the games. They storyline makes more sense (at least through the end of RE5) and it is far more engaging. The only film that even makes an attempt at the games is Apocalypse as it's basically Resident Evil 3.

[x007AceOfSpades]

Lockout - 3.5/5

 

This was a ton of fun, despite having some laughable parts. Guy Pearce stars in his first true action film, and he pulls it off well. He can play a convincing action hero/star. Luc Besson films are basically now popcorn flicks. This has the action and the humor to go along with, much like From Paris With Love.

 

The best thing to do before viewing this is to accept it for what it is. If you think of it as some sort of groundbreaking film that's epic, you will not like it, in fact you'll probably hate it. Just go forward as it being an entertaining action flick, nothing more.

 

The film has a vibe that, to me, felt like and even reminded me of Die Hard and Escape From New York. You might be able to sense the similarities, but equally, all three films are complete different.

 

I like Guy Pearce a lot, so seeing him headline the film was awesome and he totally made the character too. Maggie Grace is Maggie Grace, although this is one of her better performances, and she looked rather cute with short black hair towards the end of the film. Peter Stormare kicks ass in anything he stars in, I just love him. The film has literall no memorable villain, but in this case, its alright.

 

The action is good, although it would have been nice to see some more of it. I recommend this to anyone who love action films and Luc Besson films, its a good, fun, entertaining, action ride.

[seawolfnyy]

The Dictator - ***1/2 and Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance - **1/2.

 

The Dictator was far better than I was expecting. Sacha Baron Cohen does a great job playing up the satire and actually makes some great points about the current view of the Islam and Middle Eastern culture. It still has the Cohen's trademark crude jokes, but the development in his character help to elevate the story and make it a smarter film. A few not so veiled shots at the Bush years don't hurt either.

 

Ghost Rider 2 is also better than I was expecting. Granted it isn't great cinema by any means and it never tries to be. What it does try to be though it succeeds at very well, which a short, exciting film. The effects are vastly improved over the first film and the main title sequence is very good too (not on Daniel Kleinmann's level, but this is a Nic Cage film, not Skyfall ). Ghost Rider 2 isn't a memorable film, but it plays out much like an installment of the comics and I'm completely fine with that.

[x007AceOfSpades]

Ghost Rider 2 had great effects and direction (Neveldine/Taylor  are awesome), but the film simply... Sucked.

[seawolfnyy]

Ghost Rider 2 had great effects and direction (Neveldine/Taylor  are awesome), but the film simply... Sucked.

I felt the film was good for what it was. A Nicolas Cage movie is well a Nicolas Cage movie. For the 95 minutes I spent watching it, I enjoyed it. Unlike Green Lantern, which I only sat through, because I stupidly paid for $7.50 ticket to see it.

[x007AceOfSpades]

The story seemed interesting and better than the first, but became easily predictable, that I didn't like. I'll give a rewatch this summer, along with a bunch of other Comic Book Films as part of the Superhero Marathon.

[seawolfnyy]

Total Recall - *1/2.

 

The 2012 remake of the 1990 sci-fi classic is a complete waste of time. It is essentially a straight forward action film that relies heavily on its setting and effects whilst neglecting the characters and story. The cast is a total waste. Colin Farrell is terrible as always and has zero chemistry with anyone. Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel are as lovely as ever, but neither can save their thinly written one-dimensional characters. Bill Nighy gets all of two minutes of screen time in his Morpheus rip-off role and Bryan Cranston is wasted as the film's villain whose plan is essentially just to kill the resistance with no actual reason as to why they are the resistance. The soundtrack is bland and doesn't add anything. The effects are very good, but they appear to really be the only thing that the producers and director were interested in when making this farce. The setting had so much more potential too. They really could have played it up well with colorful, futuristic buildings. However, all we end up getting are boring, tall gray structures. Overall, despite some great effects and decent action scenes, the film is nothing more than a mindless sci-fi flick that most would be wise to avoid.

[x007AceOfSpades]

Colin Farrell is terrible as always and has zero chemistry with anyone.

 

He's a good actor, it just depends on the roles and the direction he's given. As for chemistry,  you clearly haven't seen 'Dead Man Down'.

[seawolfnyy]

Colin Farrell is terrible as always and has zero chemistry with anyone.

 

He's a good actor, it just depends on the roles and the direction he's given. As for chemistry,  you clearly haven't seen 'Dead Man Down'.

I haven't, but as you can tell I am not a Colin Farrell fan. Side note- there is a Bond reference in the film. At the beginning, when he traveling to work, he is reading The Spy Who Loved Me.

[x007AceOfSpades]

Fan or not, it shouldn't hold you back from seeing easily this years first TRUE great film.

[x007AceOfSpades]

Safe House - 2/5

 

This had so much potential to be a very well made action thriller. It had a unique plot with a highly interesting character. The reason it failed? Poor execution, generic, and predictable. That's what made this entirely un-interesting.

 

In Cape Town, South Africa, Weston, played by Ryan Reynolds is the head of a safe house for the CIA. Been there for 12 months and no "action". One day, one of the world's most hunted men, Tobin Frost, wanted for Espionage walks into a U.S. Consulate after being tailed and shot at by armed men. Frost is then brought to Weston's Safe House for Interrogation on intelligence that he may have. The safe house is then attacked by the same men after Frost and Weston is the only hope and Choice the CIA have until an extraction team can be sent in, or until they make it to another safe house.

 

Now I'm assuming, not just based on the film's assumption, but in reality, that Safe houses are in secure areas and there really is no way of finding one. Hell you could walk right past one and not even realize it. But For heavily armed men to just storm one, it seems there are two options as to why: 1.) They are super duper bad guys who just know where everything is in Cape Town. 2.) Foul Play: Someone working from within has these goons working for them to kill Tobin Frost and extract any possible intelligence. Going by simply my assumption, which I believe is real, I'm going to have to go with choice number two. Someone, on the inside, mainly CIA, tipped off the location and whereabouts of Tobin Frost and the Safe House.

 

Judging by that, watching the film it clearly and obviously becomes evident that there is someone on the inside. It's as if the filmmakers had no desire to try and hide it or even make it inconspicuous. Once you watch it, IF YOU WATCH IT, you will know what I mean. Hell by the time you figure it out that it's someone in the CIA, you already know who it is BECAUSE IT'S SO DAMN OBVIOUS. The film as a whole is predictable too. Hell, I pretty much predicted the whole thing about an hour and ten minutes into it.

 

The execution was just poor. A decently good, interesting story, that just failed when executed. Not saying it's the action, but rather the way everything came together and was presented. It's almost a bit of a mess. As for it being generic, I'm talking of course about the action scenes. There's nothing spectacular about the action scenes in the film. We've seen them all before. Maybe in a Michael Bay film, but either way, it's nothing new to the viewer, and because of that, it has no real effect. It's like watching paint dry. Fast paced action, shaky cam, quick cuts, generic action film music.

 

With a great cast that includes Denzel Washington, Ryan Reynolds, Brenden Gleeson, Sam Shepard, Robert Patrick, Fares Fares, and the beautiful Vera Farmiga, they just couldn't save this film from the impending doom.

 

If you have an interest in it, then check it out, but I honestly urge you to just pass on this.

[S K Y F A L L]

I thought you would have liked SAFE HOUSE Axe, seems I liked it a little more then you did. Will have to give it another watch, I felt it kind of had a Bourne feel to it. I read they might make a sequel to it. LOL. 

[x007AceOfSpades]

I wanted to like it, but  It was just too  generic and predictable, and I just couldn't enjoy it because of that.

 

I also read a sequel is being made. I hope it goes straight to DVD, I honestly don't see it doing well with a wide release.

[S K Y F A L L]

JACK REACHER 

 

I didn't care much for Tom Cruise's normal performance of cocky tough guy but the story seemed interesting enough although I found it slow at times. This film is kind of gritty and not really my style, so I don't think I'll be rushing to see a sequel if there is one. I heard the person who directed it will be directing MI5, so I suppose this film is a protype to that. Robert Duvall is in this and gives the film that much need DAYS OF THUNDER nostalgic feel we all have been waiting for. I give this Tom Cruise film 2 out 5 jumps on Oprah's couch. 

[x007AceOfSpades]

Depending on the viewer, I've found 'Jack Reacher' to be a "Hit & Miss". Whilst I loved the film and included it on my top ten list, It can feel slow sometimes, but it's still highly interesting.

 

Love the rating system too S K Y F A L L!

[tdalton]

Updated...

• THE DARK KNIGHT RISES ****1/2
• JACK REACHER ****
• THE BOURNE LEGACY ****
• LOOPER ****
• THE INNKEEPERS ****
• BATMAN: THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS PART 1 ****
• TED ***1/2
• HAYWIRE ***
• BUTTER ***
• PROMETHEUS ***
• AMERICAN REUNION ***
• THE CAMPAIGN ***
• TOTAL RECALL **1/2
• LOCKOUT **1/2
• TAKEN 2 **1/2
• SKYFALL **1/2
• THE HOUSE AT THE END OF THE STREET **1/2
• THE CABIN IN THE WOODS *
• PIRANHA 3DD (0 STARS)

Edited by tdalton, 19 May 2013 - 04:24 AM.

[seawolfnyy]

 

Updated...

• PIRANHA 3DD (0 STARS)

You actually wasted money on Piranha 3DD?

[x007AceOfSpades]

 

 

Updated...

• PIRANHA 3DD (0 STARS)

You actually wasted money on Piranha 3DD?

 

 

I had the same though. Everyone has different tastes apparently...

[tdalton]

 

 

Updated...

• PIRANHA 3DD (0 STARS)

You actually wasted money on Piranha 3DD?

 

 

I haven't "wasted money" on Piranha 3DD.  Saw it for free, and only because of Danielle Panabaker's involvement, who I've been a fan of since she starred in the short-lived James Woods drama Shark on CBS some years ago.  

[x007AceOfSpades]

Now that was a great show.

[seawolfnyy]

Ah, Danielle Panabaker.

[tdalton]

Updated...

• THE DARK KNIGHT RISES ****1/2
• JACK REACHER ****
• THE BOURNE LEGACY ****
• LOOPER ****
• THE INNKEEPERS ****
• BATMAN: THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS PART 1 ****
• TED ***1/2
• HAYWIRE ***
• BUTTER ***
• PROMETHEUS ***
• AMERICAN REUNION ***
• THE CAMPAIGN ***
• TOTAL RECALL **1/2
• LOCKOUT **1/2
• TAKEN 2 **1/2
• SKYFALL **1/2
• THE HOUSE AT THE END OF THE STREET **1/2
• THE AVENGERS *1/2
• THE CABIN IN THE WOODS *
• PIRANHA 3DD (0 STARS)

[x007AceOfSpades]

Chernobyl Diaries - 0/5

What do you get when you take The Blair Witch Project, Night Of The Living Dead, and The Hills Have Eyes? You get this god forsaken nightmare, Chernobyl Diaries, another one of Oren Peli's produced crap after getting lucky with Paranormal Activity.

Six young tourists go on vacation are are traveling throughout Europe and decide to take a tour through Pripyat, the abandoned city neighbored to Chernobyl. With there cool, Ukrainian tour guide, what could go wrong? But first, who in the right mind would want to go over there. Sure the radiation levels are down, but still, WHO?! The answer is six dumb & young Americans who happen to think it will be "cool" Well as usual, everything goes wrong, their tour guide is killed, and one of them is attacked. With the car rendered dead, and whatever lurks outside, they appear to be trapped to be Pripyat.

It's a somewhat interesting premise, though it's really just The Hills Have Eyes Goes International!, it fails by not even being able to carry on any sort of suspense or horror it brings to life. Not to mention it uses just about every single horror film cliche in the book. There's never really a moment where you feel frightened at all, you just sit there actually hope that these people would shut up and die already. Yes, the most annoying cast and atrocious acting yet. Horrible acting, dark lighting, shaky cam, and this is what you get.

Nothing memorable or even remotely worth watching. I'm going to pretend this never came to existence.
 

[S K Y F A L L]

Just  came across this trailer for a film called THE CONSPIRACY. I guess it came out in 2012 at film festivals and is only now making its way to us. I'm really looking forward to it.

 

[x007AceOfSpades]

Alex Cross - 2/5

 

I saw this because I enjoyed the first two Alex Cross films and this had my interest, only slightly, but mainly because I heard Matthew Fox was just creepy in this, so what the hell. If only I stayed away from it as I had already. Alex Cross is around the same tier as straight to DVD Steven Seagal films.

 

Alex Cross (Tyler Perry) is a Detroit Detective who is called to investigate a crime scene with four dead people, including a woman who was tortured, Cross comes to a conclusion that the man who did this was highly trained and deadly and extremely professional. The man also leaves behind a drawing and is dubbed Picasso (Matthew Fox) and is next targeting a German businessman, however his efforts are stopped by Cross. Afterwards, Cross believes the real target is Giles Mercier (Jean Reno) and Picasso begins targeting each one of Cross' teammates. Cross must do everything he can to save himself, his team, and his family and stop Picasso before he strikes again.

 

If there's anything good about this, It's Matthew Fox who turns in one hell of a creepy performance as Picasso. Aside from the fact he was dedicated as hell but dropping down to 4% Body fat, getting shredded as hell, and just coming off as a cold blooded killer, he actually pulled it off quite well, so Kudos to you Jack!(Lost Reference.) Everything else, is just "meh" of Fail. The direction is sloppy, and instead of getting a suspense thriller, you get a half-assed Straight to DVD action film. I suppose it was destined for that once Rob Cohen signed on to direct. Then you have Tyler Perry who just felt entirely out of place with everyone. James Patterson may say he is the true film adaption of his character, but there is no way in hell he surpasses Morgan Freeman's Cross. Perry, who you can tell was enthusiastic about the role, fell incredibly short and instead leaves viewers laughing and saying "Look, Madea's in an action film! LOL"

 

Extremely disappointed, but I know I'll never have to watch this again, ever. As for a supposed sequel, It'll only work if they get rid of Tyler Perry, who just ruined it for me, on top of other things.

[S K Y F A L L]

SAVAGES (2012)

Seen this at a friends can't say I enjoyed it all that much. It about a pair of weed dealers who share a girlfriend and get mixed up with people worse then themselves. Not Oliver Stone's best work IMO. 

 

THE IDLES OF MARCH (2012)

I was hoping this was going to be like GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK or MICHEAL CLAYTON  but I felt it was a lot less and by the end I wish I hadn't watched it. 

 

THE IMPOSSIBLE (2012)

This was a pretty moving story of one family struggles to survive and find one another during and after the December 26th, 2004 Indiana Ocean Tsunami . I was really moved by their story and I don't think I realized just how devastating the destruction of the tsunami was. Obi-Wan-Kenobi Ewan McGregor delivers a dramatic performance along with the rest of the cast and he can't rely on the force to get him out of this one. The first scene caught me off guard and I was really interested in what it was they were doing at the start of the film with the candles...

[Professor Pi]

 

SAVAGES (2012)

Seen this at a friends can't say I enjoyed it all that much. It about a pair of weed dealers who share a girlfriend and get mixed up with people worse then themselves. Not Oliver Stone's best work IMO. 

 

I was really disappointed with this too.  Was hoping it'd be a study of characters facing the cold consequences of their fateful decisions, like in Breaking Bad.  But rather than explore the dichotomy between growing public acceptance of the drug versus the violence of the cartels coming into the country,  instead Stone uses it to revel in depicting needlessly explicit violence yet again.  Also, the interesting sub-plot of the agricultural-engineering angle was wasted. And the ending was really bizarre, giving an alternate version right on the heals of its climax.

[S K Y F A L L]

 

 

SAVAGES (2012)

Seen this at a friends can't say I enjoyed it all that much. It about a pair of weed dealers who share a girlfriend and get mixed up with people worse then themselves. Not Oliver Stone's best work IMO. 

 

I was really disappointed with this too.  Was hoping it'd be a study of characters facing the cold consequences of their fateful decisions, like in Breaking Bad.  But rather than explore the dichotomy between growing public acceptance of the drug versus the violence of the cartels coming into the country,  instead Stone uses it to revel in depicting needlessly explicit violence yet again.  Also, the interesting sub-plot of the agricultural-engineering angle was wasted. And the ending was really bizarre, giving an alternate version right on the heals of its climax.

 

Well put and I agree. The alternate ending was disappointing, what the narrator would have liked to tell us compared to what did happen. 

[x007AceOfSpades]

The Watch - 2.5/5

 

Let me start off by saying that I had no intentions to ever see this, however, when you don't update your Netflix DVD Queue for Quite some time, they end up shipping this.

The Watch is a comedy about a group of guys that start a neighborhood watch after a man one of them works with is killed, violently too. Afterwards, it's up to them with their watch to find who or what is responsible for killing him. When weird things begin to happen in their town, and weird goo begins turn up, it all points to signs of aliens.

 

With the exception of Richard Ayoade, everyone else, Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, and Jonah Hill play the usual characters that they happen to play in most, if not all of their films, and with the direction of the plot that it goes in, it becomes quite predictable about half-way through and begins lose some steam, if there ever was any. There's a few funny jokes and moments in this film, but overall it feels like a missed opportunity for what could have been really good.