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The Heart Bleeds Ice - Discussion


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#61 Loomis

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Posted 28 February 2006 - 01:10 PM

Nicely timed, spy. I'd been thinking this was due for a re-read.

#62 spynovelfan

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Posted 31 August 2006 - 01:15 PM

It's Jim's birthday today. As a mark of respect, I think that all members of CBN should read this extraordinary novella of his, which is far and away better than anything written about Bond since, oh, You Only Live Twice. :) It's right here:

http://debrief.comma...showtopic=24822

#63 Mister Asterix

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Posted 31 August 2006 - 02:19 PM

It's Jim's birthday today. As a mark of respect, I think that all members of CBN should read this extraordinary novella of his, which is far and away better than anything written about Bond since, oh, You Only Live Twice. :P It's right here:

http://debrief.comma...showtopic=24822



Oh I don’t know about that. Just Another Kill – even unfinished — gives it a run for its money. :)

#64 MkB

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Posted 28 April 2008 - 06:59 PM

I've just finished THBI! My first encounter with a Jim's fanfic (I made the vow to wait until JAK is completed before starting it)... Much has been said about it in the above posts, so I won't be long :)
Very enjoyable read, a leg up on many other fanfics! :tup: :tup: :(
The opening was a bit slow, as someone pointed out, but I rather liked it. Kind of travelogue feeling. The end, on the other hand, came at a rather fast pace, as a surprise, and with a disconcerting reverse structure I felt a bit uneasy. It looks a bit like you could have developped your novella into a full-length novel, but chose to end it up abruptly to fit the "short story" format. Had you any project of the kind? Just curious :D
Cheers! I can't wait for JAK to be completed now! :D

#65 Jim

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Posted 25 July 2010 - 01:47 PM

Due to various moves and upgrades and stuff, this has all gone a bit, so will repost it shortly - needs a bit of a refresh anyway. Many thanks to stromberg for the pdf.

In the meantime, have a cover. Is obviously my day for "covers for unpublishable rubbish". Attached File  hbi.jpg   1.19MB   22 downloads

#66 Aris007

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Posted 14 August 2010 - 04:28 PM

Nice chapter Jim. I especially loved the first half and the scene in the dining room. However, this fellow Masaniello talks A LOT and many times off-topic.

Anyway I'm looking forward to the next part.

#67 Jim

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Posted 14 August 2010 - 06:45 PM

Have reposted this as it all went a bit odd - most of it disappeared - following the forum re-do. Tweaked it a little.

#68 Bryce (003)

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Posted 14 August 2010 - 06:59 PM

Lovely stuff Jim. Despite your countless attempts to plan an amusing death for me over the years, our valued opinions on socks and such, you do have quite the Fleming in you. Quite enjoyed this last bit. Well done sir, well done. Cheers. :D

#69 Aris007

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Posted 15 August 2010 - 08:21 AM

It was a nice read, Sir! It took away my boredom in just a second. Thanks a lot and keep us updated with the second part! :D

#70 terminus

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Posted 19 August 2010 - 12:52 AM

I began reading this tonight - an interesting divergence to while away my time until the next installment of 'Those Whom The Gods Love -' - after it had proved to be a daunting read previously. The chapters are very long. Tonight, I conquered that apprehension and began reading - and with the colourful description of Naples and the introduction of the early players in a 'not-quite Fleming, not-quite Not-Fleming' fashion that created pictures in my mind of Sean Connery chainsmoking in a sixties movie.

#71 Jim

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Posted 19 August 2010 - 05:07 AM

Nice chapter Jim. I especially loved the first half and the scene in the dining room. However, this fellow Masaniello talks A LOT and many times off-topic.

Anyway I'm looking forward to the next part.


Thank you, that's very kind - and the second (final) part is up there. Many thanks to stromberg for the "cover".

Masaniello is based on my brother-in-law and what you've written is as good a description of him as anyone could give!

I began reading this tonight - an interesting divergence to while away my time until the next installment of 'Those Whom The Gods Love -' - after it had proved to be a daunting read previously. The chapters are very long. Tonight, I conquered that apprehension and began reading - and with the colourful description of Naples and the introduction of the early players in a 'not-quite Fleming, not-quite Not-Fleming' fashion that created pictures in my mind of Sean Connery chainsmoking in a sixties movie.


Thanks. Hopefully it's not too daunting but I appreciate that it has a certain girth.

#72 chrisno1

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Posted 23 August 2010 - 01:17 PM

The Heart Bleeds Ice

Not a lot on last weekend, so I took time out to read The Heart Bleeds Ice. It has a nice cover. I prefer the one with the flower.

Jim, well, what can I say? Firstly, I need to let you know I approached this review with some trepidation. Many posters have recommended this story in these discussion pages and sung its praises; unfortunately, as I’m something of a ‘rogue reviewer’ and someone who habitually finds it hard to be pleased by anything (except perhaps a dish of beef carpaccio accompanied by a subtle Barbaresco) I'm not offering undiluted praise. I do understand the story is not new, so a lot of the issues I raise are somewhat retrospective. However the novella is new to me, so I came to it fresh. I only perused other contributors’ comments after I’d finished reading and had written a speculative first draft review.

I loath to provide what could be seen as ‘criticism’ because I was very impressed with The Heart Bleeds Ice. Overall it flowed beautifully, and I appreciated the intricate structure and imaginative narrative. I was relieved, while reading some other comments, to see I wasn’t the only person getting a little bogged down, because I kept asking myself ‘why am I struggling to finish this page or that page?’ I felt I should be in love with this story, because you clearly lavished a lot of love onto the pages yourself. That I didn’t initially worried me, but as I started to unfold the corners of what I’d read, I couldn’t help but see why I didn’t love it.

The Heart Bleeds Ice is an adult, contemplative and strong work which displays tremendously deft skill. What I offer here is a genuine appraisal of what I read. I won’t use the ‘C’ word, because I’m not qualified to attach merit to anyone’s writing. But I am honest about what I read. So, here goes...

Jim, you clearly treasure your prose. There was a depth and intensity to your descriptions which at times is truly haunting. You convey moments of time excellently; such as a raindrop on a window, the hush of a kiss or the rainbow colours of an evening sunset. This was a marked surprise, as (no disrespect to anyone intended) the quality of Fan Fiction writing can be very variable [and I would include myself in that!]. Here though, there was much to admire. I sensed a close affinity to the surroundings, the scent and sound of places, the atmosphere and attitudes of people, one which could only suggest personal experience. This works well, particularly in evoking the Venetian and Neapolitan locations.

However while appreciating what is cleverly constructed and ebullient craftsmanship, I did wonder how much of it was purely ornamental. There is a lot of substance in these descriptions, much of it concrete and specific, and a host of similes and metaphors, but it didn’t provide me with any emotional response. It often felt cold and calculating. Nothing is left to the imagination and incidental details about insignificant characters began to grate as early as the Venice restaurant scene. Your constant use of triple rhetoric concentrates the reader at the start of the piece, but grows weary by about half way. Often you increase your adjectives to four, five or six in a sentence, virtually overloading any pretext. While your observational instincts are well honed I think a vivid but economical style would add sharpness to your reflections. Sometimes less is definitely more.

I was worried by your habit of leaving single words or short phrases to stand in isolation. The earliest instance was “inevitable... collision.” While I understand the process, I felt this rather prejudges the intelligence of the reader, as if they need to be told the meaning of each individual word in its context. Employed occasionally, for emphasis, the technique is worthwhile, but used consistently it becomes irritating, because you are either removing contradiction or implanting the possibility of doubt. A reader should be able to decipher text and draw their own conclusions. This technique also has the side effect of slowing down the narrative.

Throughout the first two sequences, the pace hardly alters. The languid, measured nature of the storytelling lulls the reader into your idyllic locations, yet without peaks and troughs in tempo, you create next to no urgency. [Perhaps you didn’t want any.] The passages of dialogue in the second chapter have exactly the same rhythm as the descriptive sections and people just don’t talk like that. You handled dialogue better in chapter one.

I admit this adagio style adds suppleness to some sections; the harsh realities of Naples become brutishly fascinating, the stark cliffs on the Amalfi coast are glorious multicoloured landscapes, almost like a series of great oil paintings in words. In some genres this would be an asset, but in a thriller I feel it detaches the reader too far away from the story in hand, adding not just a breath of local life and character, but a layer of unnecessary subtext. Not everything has to have meaning; sometimes things can be exactly what they appear.

The lack of a linear narrative during the final pages allows you to inject the taut edge missing from the earlier two segments. Here though, I felt you chopped-and-changed too much, making the switch from scene to scene (cut to cut?) so swift it almost felt like a different piece of work entirely. This spoilt the slow tension you spent the previous few pages building.

At this point I lost a little faith in the story as I failed to see the motivation behind Liz’s actions. I may have missed it amongst the verbosity. [Correction, I got the motivation, but I didn’t believe it. There was no clue in her persona that she was capable of such a crime. Did I miss it?] Over all, the tale is very slight, and is merely the string on which you hang your meditations. Basically the piece boils down to two long essays, one about Napoli and the Neapolitans, the other about love and regret.

I liked the character of Rico Masaniello. He felt very real and through his mouth you provided several beautiful anecdotes about Italy and Italians. The clandestine meeting between him and Bond was probably the high point of the story. I was reminded of Bond’s dinner with Kristatos in For Your Eyes Only. Here you expanded on that scene and expatiated the dialogue. It set the scenario well and allowed you to invest time in presenting your troubled and weary version of James Bond.

Your 007 is a man who thinks a lot about life and, while I believed this interpretation, he has a turn of phrase and thought that strikes me as a little too introspective. Bond should certainly consider his actions and his place in the world, but does he have to worry about the street minstrel’s life as well?

There’s a curious speech Bond gives that begins: “I think we try hard to make ourselves believe that when we find some merest scrap of contact, that that is love...” This sounds very familiar, but I couldn’t place the origin. It doesn’t sound like the James Bond I know; it sounds more like his heroines. When Bond bleakly says “I’ve given up trying to find love” I believed it, as it was workable, simple, unfussy.

Dialogue is always tricky. While Masaniello sounded very unique and was a good counter foil to Bond’s suspicious and irritable agent, providing the first part with a fine two handed script, Bond and Liz tended to sound exactly the same, hence the second half was a bit of a trial. They are clearly falling in love but I didn’t buy into their emotional needs. Bond seems distant and so is she. You appear not to believe it yourself, and declare the romance with a startlingly obvious analogy as Bond wonders “how far out of depth they were.”

Towards the end, Bond is finding the realities of his life difficult and ends up once more putting aside his needs for those of his country. He is angry with his superiors, yet he surely should be angry at Liz, and that doesn’t come across at all. The attention he pays to the eventual killing portrays a callous, hard hearted agent at work, yet you have already displayed that this Bond is not so. The ultimate sacrifice of his feelings, and his obvious distaste for what he has to achieve, sits badly next to Bond’s earlier throw away line that “the deaths of many men could be balanced out by this [a superbly rustic meal].” This is a very different Bond to the reflector we met in chapter one and two. The Liz he speaks to in London reads like a completely different person as well.

The London pages are an enigma to me, contrasting sharply to the preceding sections, bearing a thread of bleak inevitability unseen in the rest of the work. Those few pages are much the better for it, Bond’s dive in the ocean aside. Unfortunately, balanced against the earlier eloquence, the scales tip alarmingly one way and then the other, upsetting the whole piece. Hence at your climax, despite Bond’s turmoil, you deliver a dreamy, fragile perspective, which harks back to Bond and Liz’s deep discussions about love. This neatly frames the story, but delivers a sweet-and-sour conclusion.

I agree this conflict is one that raged in Fleming’s work, but you can’t have it both ways, the author has to come down on one side or another. Fleming, with the exception of Casino Royale and On Her Majesty’s, always walked with the devils. When he switches sides, he does so with careful, significant prose, that offers tantalising glimpses of humanity but still leaves much to the reader’s imagination. This allows the romance to build ‘off the page’ as it were and does not telegraph any likely outcome. We know Bond and Liz are fated because you spend so much time talking about how voided their lives are. Bond especially would not be so transparent.

I notice you originally wrote this novella in 2005 and I’m interested to see how your other work progressed (when I get the time to read it.) There is plenty of excellent work here, Jim, but I’d be wary of overindulgence. As I said earlier, less is often more.

#73 George88

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Posted 28 August 2010 - 07:59 AM

That's an interesting review and before I post my own thoughts, most of which I am afraid are contrary to yours, I think something we can agree on is that Jim's work - whether he wants it or not - is pretty much now the only fan fiction littering this site that merits any substantial feedback. As far as that goes, it stands aside, and alone, from anything else of the usual "world's worst arms dealer / terrorist / strange homoeroticism" prevalent around here.

Little else justifies any attention at all.

I can certainly see where you are coming from in much of what you say. The tone of The Heart Bleeds Ice is inconsistent but to me it is a designed intention that it has unsettling, disjointed rhythms - the structure towards the end is clear evidence of this intention to leave the reader slightly distant from it.

As to the lack of conviction in the principal relationship, I suppose I have the (great) advantage of reading Just Another Kill and understanding Jim's manifesto.

Put bluntly, he doesn't like James Bond. Or, perhaps fairer, he is interested in James Bond (no other reason to haunt this site with his often cruel putdowns or entertain us with hundreds of pages of prose) but he does not admire him. He strikes me as interested in what makes James Bond so horrible, and some is through natural choice and some of it is by being exploited by others. I may have that wrong but it's the impression I definitely get.

As a result, if you can put yourself through it, I would recommend reading The Heart Bleeds Ice again with a few ideas consequential to that, in mind. Namely:-

- yes, it is cold and calculated and detached, dressed up as something else. It's the chill in the summer holiday breeze. He does this - it seems to be a stylistic tic, distancing the reader from what he or she is reading. Somethimes this is structural - the ending of this is a classic example, much of Just Another Kill too - and sometimes it is...

- character. Masaniello is a classic Jim trick - he is great fun but it's deceptive - the remainder of the characters, Bond included, are vile. You note that the relationship between Bond and Liz reads stiltedly - again, I took this to be deliberate - these are not two people falling in love, these are two murderers playing at what love is. Accordingly, it will never read well because they don't believe it themselves because of who they are. I would agree the "out of their depth" analogy is on the face of it unsubtle and a bit cheap - but not when aplied to this analysis of the characters, which only really comes through on re-reading. They are out of their depth because their depth is killing people, not loving them. They don't know how to do that - Bond admits it - and therefore their discourse about it is entirely stilted. you're right - real people don't talk like that. But that's the point I think - these are not real people. Real people do not go around doing the sort of horrid things these two do. It's bound to end badly, and it does.

I took Liz to be an intentionally articifical person - the description of her tastefully distressed flat was I think significant - and she is as hopeless as Bond in trying this sort of thing out.

Liz is a difficult person with whom to engage, but I understood this to be deliberate - perhaps reading too much. Abused by two men - physcially by one, emotionally by the other, her new husband ignoring her - but able to destroy both husbands, along comes Bond to rescue her from both, or be the means of rescue, and then he turns out to be the one to kill her. You mentioned you weren't too sure of Bond's character towards the end of the story but I took it as whatever soul searching he is trying to convince himself he must do, he's going to kill her anyway, because that's what he does. He will always go back. He cannot save her, not because it is an impossible situation, but that is his nature.

In passing, the thing that struck me as the most unsubtle was the quite evident mickey-taking of the conspiracy theories behind the death of Princess Diana - dispassionate adultress with a charitable streak gets offed by the dark forces of the British government before she becomes very embarrassing - but no-one else seems to have mentioned it. I don't think I've made this up and would be interested in Jim's denial because I won't believe it! Funny idea, if very cruel, that were such events true (which obviously they are not) then James Bond is exactly the sort of maladjusted horrible killer within the Establishment who would be tasked to do it. This is not the Bond of the crocodile submarine or the exploding alarm clock. I laughed. Then felt a bit guilty.

The other unsettling part of the end - and I'm afraid I don't agree with your view that the tone can't shift and the author not have things both ways, whyever not, no rules here - is that it all happens on Bond's word only. We don't actually have anything to go on except for what he saw and because - going back to the umbrealla proposition - the Stewart Bond is an utterly reprehensible man, having read this story now for a third time I am left wondering whether Bond cooks up this plan to dispose of an embarrassment to himself, knowing full well what M's disapproval will be. After all, he is not totally overwhelmed by Liz and there are points here and there where he is evidently irritated by her and he does realise his own precarious position. Maybe this is a reading-in too far and I should leave it alone now.

There are a couple of other things you mention with which I must take issue, but only in the spirit of debate (and for a fan fiction to generate debate and discussion other than "I liked the fight" is evidence that this is engaging work, even if one is not totally sold).

The digression with the street musician - yes, for those looking for the next explosion or car chase, the piece is ambling at that point. But this idea of artifice, or emotional pretence, of stringing two people along... Liz and her Bond and her husband, and Bond being no more than a tourist to that world - it all comes around. It's a simple enough foreshadowing, really. True, some of the stuff like the observations of the "country set" woman at the party seem a little disengaged but that's only because so much of it is deceptively disengaged. There may be a deeper point to that character but I am struggling to see it. The only thing I can think of is that this woman is one of the few people without any "side" and therefore should realistically be a figure to admire amongst this company. Even the charming Masaniello has interchangeable first names depending on whse side he feels he is on.

The other thing I felt I had to address was your observation about the simplicity of the plot. True, there are no massive cliffhangers nor an incident every paragraph, but the plot is strong enough to carry what it carries. Additionally, look at the Fleming short stories - most have sparse plots (and only a few have sustained or sustainable action scenes).

As for the prose - well, love it or hate it, that's the man's style. Evidently Jim has a vocabulary and isn't afraid to show it. Does it get in the way? Depends what you thinjk it's in the way of, really. Here, my own reaction is that it serves his purpose in languidly inculcating the holiday, slow atmosphere, and then becoming more urgent when everything - including the structure of the story - gets knocked off the rails at the end. Possibly some of those more designed "pauses" he puts in can grate and I would agree he does use that single-word paragraph trick a bit too often...

...perhaps.

If I have understood it and not transposed onto it more cleverness than is there, actually the excess verbiage becomes increasingly sparse; a lengthy description may have some other significance. I may be wrong, but although it looks flabby this is tauter than it appears at first (which could apply to James Bond himself in his advancing years, which this is).

The atmosphere created in the Naples scenes - and the classic meal in the tripperia - is enough in any event to read this - in tone, in rhythm, this is echt Fleming. A perfect pastiche.

On the whole, although I preferred Just Another Kill but perhaps only because of its utterly epic nature,l this is, basically, an essential piece of Bond fiction. More accessible (ie shorter) than Just Another Kill but another incredibly rich and rewarding read. Man's wasting his time on Bond stories really as there is a significsnt prose talent here, but whilst he does, I am happy for him to continue to waste mine as well. It's not for everyone, maybe.

Certainly I think you've raised my enthusiasm to give this another read but I would recommend you do too, and even if much of what I observe doesn't convince you, perhaps being optimistic it may. I would like to know Jim's view on which of us is "right" - although that's not really what I'm trying to say, hope you understand - but I suspect he won't.

#74 chrisno1

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Posted 01 September 2010 - 11:53 AM

What an excellent response, George88. Isn’t debate is a wonderful thing?

A few points:

While I agree Fan Fiction isn’t always of a great standard, I was perplexed by your assertion that “little else justifies any attention at all.” That’s a somewhat blinkered view and I think your assessment of Jim’s The Heart Bleeds Ice, while having merit, is influenced by the opinion you have just expressed.

It’s also a bit of a slap in the face for any one else who posts Fan Fiction. Most FF (certainly Bond FF) is reverential and while some is poor and much average, occasionally there is significantly good writing here, interesting ideas and dedicated authors, who want to have their fresh stab at the Bond legacy in full knowledge they’ll never be offered an opportunity by Glidrose.

While there will always be a case for high brow literary fiction on FF, it isn’t to everyone’s tastes. I am not a great fan of that particular literary form, but recognise its strengths and weaknesses. For me, in essence, any story must hold its reader enthralled, grip them and make them want to turn the page. I think I mentioned that at times I struggled to do this with The Heart Bleeds Ice and, if that is the case, how can I offer a glowing tribute? Certainly I salute the technique. The dexterity displayed is at times exemplary, but that wouldn’t necessarily be enough to retain my interest.

You suggest the intention of the author is to distance the reader from the action. This worries me. While judicious distancing can actually focus attention on detail, the structure used here is almost over powering in its complexity.

Take the long opening scene: it’s a series of acute multilayered observational stories and they are piled on top of each other, often in a non-sequential order that only clarifies itself at the scene’s end. This doesn’t unsettle, but confuses. I agree Jim gradually moves away from this style as the novella progresses, but at the outset of a novel this can be highly disconcerting. Many readers will quickly become disillusioned and simply switch off. While I have more fortitude than many, when I need to reread passages to recall who a narrator is talking about, I am not being gripped, but frustrated.

You say Jim doesn’t like James Bond, or doesn’t admire him, but I don’t see that. There may be a lot about Bond’s world the author is disinclined to praise, but the character is, in the main, well rounded. During the London scenes the author is at pains to stress Bond is more than uncomfortable with the assassination. He is almost physically sick, even his beer tastes vile. The tightness of the scenes is a reflection of his stunted emotional state. That’s why these sequences work well.

In the longer, drawn out Amalfi stages, Bond isn’t nearly so contrite. He’s calculating, yes, but he’s thoughtful, caring, searching for the means to protect Liz. To me these facets attest that Bond is human and suffers man’s frailties, such as love and regret. What specifically disappointed me was one extract, where Bond and Liz discuss death, the future and the meaning of love. It was cathartic, unreal, unlikely, perhaps not from Liz, but definitely from this Bond.

In all the other sequences Bond’s thoughts are precisely those, given form in descriptive prose; here they are displayed as speech and ring very hollow. If this was the author’s intent, then it is a misnomer, because in the same passage, he writes that Bond has always imagined sharing an afternoon as perfect as this one with Liz. He doesn’t use the words, but this is love and Bond struggles with his feelings. That’s the real Bond again; he can’t discuss love and doesn’t: he remains silent. In the same manner he struggles to talk to Liz in London as her death rushes towards him – indeed in those passages he can’t even think love or death, he simply acts it, wishing it would go away. The earlier Amalfi speeches are out of place and unduly grand.

While I agree Bond is uncertain of Liz, this merely makes their relationship even stranger and forces the romance when it should be natural. Bond clearly has doubts about her past. The author provides a flashback to Krest’s inquest and it is implied Bond has drawn his own conclusions. Yet this runs contrary to his actions. Bond shows no inclination to implicate her, either here or in The Hildebrand Rarity; it’s important to remember he disposed of the body himself and is an accessory to murder; why is he bothered about whether Liz is innocent or not? If Bond was that concerned he would have alerted the authorities correctly. He was protecting her six years ago and is doing so again now because he secretly loves her, or at least desires her. The author is never clear in recognising this and chooses instead to build contradictory behaviours into their friendship.

I don’t consider that amounts to a fake relationship, although I can see why one might form that opinion. I agree it’s an unreal partnership, but they are not being deceitful here. If Bond genuinely believes Liz is a murderer, his shock at the final revelation could hardly be more unlikely. That’s also another contradiction. Liz certainly shows a slightly devious nature, particularly regarding money, but I simply didn’t believe her as an infanticide.

While she may want to save these babies, Liz doesn’t have any motive to kill them. She’s upset they are suffering. But is it in her nature to commit the crimes? The author suggests she’s doing it out of love and kindness. But Liz isn’t an ingénue; she’s on her second marriage, used to wealth and privilege, understands the workings of the lower reaches of politics and has suffered herself, yet she never once betrays signs of homicidal tendencies, not even in The Hildebrand Rarity when she may be a killer. Yes, she talks calmly and dispassionately about death, but it’s her ex-husband’s death, a misogynist wife beater. Additionally, given all the efforts she makes to conceal her guilt, why is she so intent on approbation? It seems entirely inappropriate for a murderer to draw attention to herself in such a way. It could be a sort of self-seeking publicity, but again I don’t detect that in Liz’s portrait. There are some fumbling lines about recognition but they don’t cut the mustard for me.

You suggest this is an obvious allusion to Princess Diana [no baby-killer either]. I’m afraid it wasn’t obvious to me. Now I’m nodding my head and thinking “Ah, well” but I still wouldn’t have picked up on it. I can see the idea, but it’s lost in translation.

Overall Liz’s motive is part of the story’s weakness. As I said, the plot isn’t the heart of this piece; you can take it or leave it. The story is still, for me, two rather excellent essays, about Italy and about love. They are woven thickly into the threads of the narrative and almost smother it. This dense storytelling does not sit well in the thriller genre and as such The Heart Bleeds Ice isn’t, for me, much of a thriller. It’s more of a romance, all be it an odd, ultimately bitter, one.

When the author necessitates a terser structure at the finale, the succinct manner is appealing and serves to reignite the reader’s interest. But it’s all come a bit late in the day. The quick cutting is a polar opposite to the studied operatic feel of the earlier chapters and, as I said, I consider it reads like an entirely different work. Interspersing these scenes throughout the narrative, might have heightened awareness and intrigue. I’m sure the author wouldn’t want to give away too early the twist in his tale, but as it stands the sudden inconsistencies don’t generate a visceral response, it felt too cheerless, too deliberate.

At precisely the moment we should be feeling for Bond and his abhorrence of the task ahead of him, we have more sympathy for poor misguided and mistreated Liz Krest, or Princess Diana if you like, cut asunder by the faceless task masters of the British elite, the very fellows from who she seeks reward. This may be deliberate, but if I can’t feel a smidgen of emotion for the central character, I’m likely to be disappointed. While I wouldn’t consider Jim’s Bond dislikeable, I found no care for the central protagonist of this story.

Call me old fashioned, but I’m not one for revisionist Fan Fiction [my term]. I want my James Bond to be the one I remember from Fleming’s novels (give or take) and I want him to inhabit something of the same world. I’m not sure the Bond in The Heart Bleeds Ice does and so it disappoints me. For all the excellent work on show, it still left me cold. Fleming, frankly, doesn’t display half as much virtuosity in his prose or in his structure, but his pared down writing does elicit feelings of suffering, anger, sentiment and passion. It’s unfussy, focussed, often detached, like his hero. Jim’s writing isn’t.

When Fleming allows his characters to emote [which isn’t often], they do so in a manner that is direct and superbly believable. The introduction of Goldfinger, where Bond muses on the sack of life, is a wonderful example of what I mean by “less being more”: the success of those pages is as much due to what Fleming leaves out as what he leaves in. Reflections such as this would sit badly later in the novel – for instance when Bond is considering killing Oddjob. At these moments Fleming is careful to only describe the action exactly as it occurs, rushed, horrific, final. He saves his distancing for appropriate moments and never fails to keep our interests and sympathies firmly with his lead character. I have a distinct impression that wouldn’t bother Jim.

Whether that’s good or bad is open to debate (oh, we’re having one!) and doesn’t detract from Jim’s achievements; it is after all merely my observation. Criticism, to use the word I have grown to hate, no let’s use the term assessment, of a piece of work is very subjective. In the literary world, there are thousands of writers all fighting for a foothold in a very limited field, and one agent’s or publisher’s “no thank you” can easily be another’s “yes please.” There is a tremendous amount of dross on the bookshelves (Katie Price anyone? Or whoever it is who ghost writes for her) and I’d be the first in line to congratulate Jim on attempting to deliver a finely honed piece of fiction for free. But this novella isn’t for me and I guess when I begin to be disillusioned, I will often start to look for the negatives.

Once again I do want to stress how good I thought aspects of The Heart Bleeds Ice was, but it simply wasn’t my perfect cup of tea.

#75 George88

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Posted 04 September 2010 - 08:12 AM

That's fair enough. From what I have observed of his demeanour on this website over the years, I suspect the piece was written for Jim's entertainment and amusement first and everyone else's about ninth. Admittedly that's probably not a successful approach if ever he wished to sell anything!

I may have gone too far with the Princess Diana thing. I could say that Jim has not come in here and denied it so that confirms my point but nor has he come in here and confirmed it, and probably hasn't read any of this at all anyway.

You raise an interesting thought - is it the trappings of "thriller" and (my quotes) "expectations of what James Bond is, and what James Bond stories are about" the weakest part of this? I suspect it's not actually meant to be a thriller really but more of a mood piece (excuse the pretension) with a dusting of spies and murder. Do the James Bond elements - and the preconceptions (perhaps limiting preconceptions) of what those entail - hold back the more florid and original aspects of this, thereby headlocking them, and having the reader looking for getting on with "James Bond stuff" disorientated or disappointed? Interesting.

Insofar as it does stand as a James Bond piece, though, I wouldn't necessarily say it is revisionist - but perhaps the writer has picked up on one or two aspects of Bond's character and function and accentuated those into the whole - that's also evident in Jim's Just Another Kill and Skeletons of Yesterday, but this concentration, whilst I find it fascinating, will, I suspect, disappoint and frustrate you again should you read those pieces as well.

You've raised a number of points on the motives and thinking of - and behind - the characters upon which I would struggle to express my contrary view to my own satisfaction - I know what I want to say and I don't entirely disagree with your points, but again I think there's a deliberate murkiness in the creation.

One point you make I do wish to address directly though.

While I agree Fan Fiction isn’t always of a great standard, I was perplexed by your assertion that “little else justifies any attention at all.” That’s a somewhat blinkered view and I think your assessment of Jim’s The Heart Bleeds Ice, while having merit, is influenced by the opinion you have just expressed.


No. Truth be told I wasn't expecting much out of Jim's work - I don't understand his odd sense of humour - and was very excited when I found it rewarding. I have read everything that appears on the first page of the Fan Fiction posting part of this forum, and some other things like Evan Willnow's book and From Death's Door, both of which are very strong and perhaps more traditional Bond adventures. Without doing that my view would be uninformed and blinkered. It is an informed view but having subjected myself to some really poor stuff there, on reflection I rather wish it wasn't. As it stands, the first page of the fan fiction depository here is - Jim's work aside - universally thin and uninteresting (to me - others may find the stuff diverting and the makers must be enjpoying themselves, so that's all good). I note in passing that the comment I made last time about "little else merits any attention" or whatever it was, has been quoted elsewhere in one of the interminable trailers for the next slice of whateverness - on record, and for the avoidance of doubt, those writer's pieces are unfortunately not within the "little else". Apologies if that looks mean, but it was equally mean to have had me read the stuff. I know that looks blunt and I am sure that the gentleman is nice but just so there's no misunderstanding this time around - apologies if my obnservation could have misled last time out.

It’s also a bit of a slap in the face for any one else who posts Fan Fiction. Most FF (certainly Bond FF) is reverential and while some is poor and much average, occasionally there is significantly good writing here, interesting ideas and dedicated authors, who want to have their fresh stab at the Bond legacy in full knowledge they’ll never be offered an opportunity by Glidrose.


I don't doubt the dedication nor the ideas. Both are in abundance, that's very clear. However, the writing is bland even at the best of its spelling. Perhaps blandness doesn't distract from the relentless plots, which are usually only thrilling in their lack of originality or cohesion. Usually, the appalling spelling, anorexic characterisation and pathetic grammar are enough to turn me off. Please note that English is not my first language (although I do live in London and have lived in London for forty years) but I have tried to make it accurate and it irritates me to see what I assume are natural English speakers making a lot of errors. Not just on this website, I hasten to add.

Not that I want to dissuade anyone from continuing with whatever it is they are typing away at - and I suppose at least they can be reassured I won't be critiquing their work even if I read it because I suspect it would not be a nice thing either to write or read. Assume this is my last comment on anyone's specific work unless I find something positive to say.

I think I have written enough on that issue now as it only gets me worked up.

Still, back on the original point, I don't see any other fan works getting as much attention, or deserving it, so that speaks for itself. Actually, looking around, some of the official stuff doesn't get this much attention, so - again - perhaps that's indicative.

I am not sure I can venture much more on the piece and sorry if I went angry a bit up there. I wish you well in your own fan fiction pieces.

#76 chrisno1

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Posted 04 September 2010 - 03:50 PM

Thanks, George, again, a nice studied reply.
I don't intend to comment any more on The Heart Bleeds Ice either, but I think we perhaps share more views than we express!
On a personal level, I'm stunned by your dedication in reading everything on the FF front page. Much more dedicated than I!
I'm always open to constructive feedback, so although you indicated you don't want comment any longer on FF, if you ever want to reply to mine (even on messages) feel free.
Enjoy (or not) the reading...