37 replies to this topic

[Judo chop]

TSWLM: Bond puts the barrel of his PPK into the opening of the pipe which runs under the table, and exits directly before Stromberg

[dodge]

Puns, quips, jokes--anything's allowed as long as it's your own. You can even recycle something you've previously posted. Give us your best shot(s), on site--your true shining moment(s). I've just completed mine to start:

Roger Moore wrote his memoirs in longhand. One day during the arduous process, the entire manuscript went tumbling to the floor. Roger's elderly assistant got down on her knees and began re-sorting the pages into chapters. Before she could finish, though, her heart gave out. And Jolly Roger leaned over her body to gloat:

"Now the whole world'll know you died batching my scrawls!"

[Judo chop]

PUNS

[dodge]

Well, well. A year ago. Lord God, who remembers. Mods, merge the threads if you like.

then again...Judo's was for Bad puns. This is for the creme de la creme of puns AND quips, etc. Your call.

[dodge]

dupe. Sorry, system had frozen and didn't realize the first one went through.

[Mr. Blofeld]

In the third Craig film, Felix Leiter gets married, so Bond travels to the wedding. On set, a camera capturing the scene between the actors portraying husband and wife jerked back, knocking over a member of the crew painting the ceiling and sending a bucket of paint splashing onto the actress's head. As Jeffrey Wright began to laugh, the woman wailed:

"This never happened to the other Della!"

[dodge]

In the third Craig film, Felix Leiter gets married, so Bond travels to the wedding. On set, a camera capturing the scene between the actors portraying husband and wife jerked back, knocking over a member of the crew painting the ceiling and sending a bucket of paint splashing onto the actress's head. As Jeffrey Wright began to laugh, the woman wailed:

"This never happened to the other Della!"

How dare you be so briliant, sir! We'll meet tomorrow, on the planes of Triple E--or on the fields of drams, your choice. Ten paces. Then we'll raise our mess kits--and have one helluva lunch.

[MkB]

Mr. Kil: "I'm Mr. Kil"

Bond's Reply: "Aren't you supposed to be white and bald? No, wait... I'm sorry, that's Mr. Clean. So, yeah... can I go inside now?"

Bond's Alternate Reply:

**********************

Jinx: "I am soooo good."

Bond's Reply: "You were ok. I don't think you deserved an Oscar, but you were ok." <roll end credits>

Those two ones cracked me up!