35 replies to this topic

[Bondian]

I had the misfortune tonight of viewing Hollywoods movie namely 'The Pirates of the Caribbean', complete with a stellar cast of weak British and American untalented hams!.

Gosh, it's already 2004 and the UK have now got this poultry crappy blockbuster for hire on dvd. Not only can you get popcorn poisning from the first dvd but also the second.

Pirates of the Caribbean has got to be the start of the decline of the Hollywood movie. Not just because of the real bad acting, but from the likes of the deadful Jonathan Pryce or the even more dreary Kiera Knightley ( who looks like she needs to replace her tooth brace ) but the obvious 'green screen' that is apparent in almost every scene.

Hollywood really has a hard-on at the moment for filming the actors on set under studio lights and the background ( green screen ) with bright sunshine. There's never a shadow or 'effect' on the actors faces because there lit above by studio lights. This straight away gives the game away!.

Music wise we've got another 'Hams Zimmer' wannabee. Klaus ( whatever his name is ) does a stellar job of impersonating almost every aspect of 'Gladiator' that it made me want to puke. Why does Hollywood want to continue with the same sound and feeling that was accepted with another movie?. Is this Disney's attempt of something different?.

I sincerely wish that the UK could get the financial backing to take on Hollywood like they could do in the early 1930-40's, because we're fed up watching crappy special effects and bad acting ( mainly from the English actors ) and with a budget that could rid the world of a 'weapons of mass destruction'.

Hollywood your dieing rapidly. Nice hills, shame about the death!.


All the best,

Cheers,


Ian

[Felix_Leiter]

depp? come on?

[Bondian]

Yeah, Depp was as good as a wart on ya knobb!.

How come an east London Pirate to the usual Cornwall/Penzance Pirate?.

[Johnboy007]

I saw this movie in theaters. I don't think it was oscar worthy, but it was fun to watch.

[Bondian]

Hi johnboy007,

Well, I thought that the beginning that we were going to see an original and authentic action movie. But while the movie progressed it became tiresome and boring.

I really believe that making most of the cast British, killed the authenticity of the piece. Ok, Cornwall has got to be the best 'brogue' for a Pirate, but Depp from East London MATE?.



Ian

[SirMiles83]

Depp was great in Pirates of the Caribbean, but that was the only great thing about the film. POTC seemed like a cookie-cutter Hollywood adventure film. Too many cliches like the inept English guards or the stupid, and inept pirate henchman. Also, too many Disney-isms like when Keira's character first runs into the ghost ship crew, and they toss her and play around (I didn't know being on a cursed-ghost ship was that fun!). Too much slap-stick and the sword fighting scenes stunk. They should have learned from The Mask of Zorro on how to do a good sword-fighting scene in Hollywood.

[Bondian]

Depp was great in Pirates of the Caribbean, but that was the only great thing about the film. POTC seemed like a cookie-cutter Hollywood adventure film. Too many cliches like the inept English guards or the stupid, and inept pirate henchman. Also, too many Disney-isms like when Keira's character first runs into the ghost ship crew, and they toss her and play around (I didn't know being on a cursed-ghost ship was that fun!). Too much slap-stick and the sword fighting scenes stunk. They should have learned from The Mask of Zorro on how to do a good sword-fighting scene in Hollywood.

Hi SirMiles83,

Well I've got to say that you reply is very professional.

I was hoping to get flayed alive, but knowing CBn and the talent that lye's there dormant a good observationalist has relied.

I concur with your studies!.


Great to know you man,

All the best,

Cheers,


Ian

[Tarl_Cabot]

I thought it was entertaining fluff, nothing special. I've been dying for a good Pirate flick for years so I was happy to see it but I'd prefer a straight up, non fantasy epic like a Captain Blood remake...

Keira Knightly looks pretty damn good to me!

[Bondian]

Hi Tarl,

I agree with you up to the Kiera bit.

This films almost badly on the border of the puffy Brosnan Bond movies!. Yeeeuk.

All the best,

Cheers,


Ian

[neversaynever]

Too many cliches like the inept English guards or the stupid, and inept pirate henchman. Also, too many Disney-isms like when Keira's character first runs into the ghost ship crew, and they toss her and play around (I didn't know being on a cursed-ghost ship was that fun!).

I really liked this film! Ok, so it was about half an hour too long (and you really started to feel how long it was by the end of it), but it was an enjoyable film!

I mean, surely anyone who watches this film has to go into it just wanting to "enjoy the ride". And let's not forget that that is exactly how it started - as a Disneyland ride! So, as for the "Disney-isms", don't you think that's kind of what you've got to expect in a movie like this?

I can understand that people might not like POTC:TCOTBP, but I just don't think it's very helpful to criticise it for not being something it never set out to be.

It is just supposed to be fun. In that respect, I think it succeeds. In fact, I think it does very well.

As for the discussion about Depp, I think it is widely regarded that he was the best thing about the movie - he played it tongue-in-cheek, which is the way it should have been played. If anything, save your criticism for the oh-so-earnest Orlando (lighten up, Mr Bloom!).

[SnakeEyes]

LOL. Bondian suddenly gets a harder edge and starts speaking his mind like there's no tomorrow. Great stuff.

"worth a facial" HAHAHAHA that cracked me up something rotten. I'd 'bone' her silly (wouldn't take long on that lass i'm sure, she's half silly now).

Anyway, back to the topic of Pirates, and whist I agree it's all tosh, I really enjoy it when I watch it, but I don't watch it often else I know i'd get very bored with it. It's a good fun mindless flic for all the family, not Shakespear (or TLD!).

[Bondian]

LOL. Bondian suddenly gets a harder edge and starts speaking his mind like there's no tomorrow. Great stuff.

"worth a facial" HAHAHAHA that cracked me up something rotten. I'd 'bone' her silly (wouldn't take long on that lass i'm sure, she's half silly now).

Anyway, back to the topic of Pirates, and whist I agree it's all tosh, I really enjoy it when I watch it, but I don't watch it often else I know i'd get very bored with it. It's a good fun mindless flic for all the family, not Shakespear (or TLD!).

Hi Snake,

Well I've got to say that this site is becoming too modest and very English.

I've been modest and soft for a long time ( which is my natural being ). But as there appears to be no 'hard man' left in this site, I want to be that man.

I'm fed up with being Mr 'Nice Guy'. I want to pump so iron with the hardest of CBn.

Quite frankly my dear ( I don't give a damn ) I'm fed up with being the 'tosser' of this site, I want to do a Dalton Bond and 'uplift' this stagnent site and apply some nervousness to it!

The worm has turned and lets hope that it long enough!. LOL


I love ya Guy's but I do not like the way this site is becomming unefficient without Daniel!. I'm sorry, but I used to like his objectiveness!.


Cheers Snake,

All the best,

Cheers,


Ian

[neversaynever]

apply some nervousness to it!

What a strange turn of phrase.

Is it we who are supposed to be nervous?

[Bondian]

apply some nervousness to it!

What a strange turn of phrase.

Is it we who are supposed to be nervous?

What ever you say!.

[Tarl_Cabot]

You're funny Bondian and full of surprises and drunk I'll bet! ...sometimes soooo polite and then quite shockingly vulgar!

What happended to 'Sensualist'? Kristian? I noticed lots of regulars are absent. I moved and was offline for two weeks and I'm on dial up for the time being so I don't post as often...

[SirMiles83]

I mean, surely anyone who watches this film has to go into it just wanting to "enjoy the ride". And let's not forget that that is exactly how it started - as a Disneyland ride! So, as for the "Disney-isms", don't you think that's kind of what you've got to expect in a movie like this?

I can understand that people might not like POTC:TCOTBP, but I just don't think it's very helpful to criticise it for not being something it never set out to be.

It is just supposed to be fun. In that respect, I think it succeeds. In fact, I think it does very well.

I understand where you're coming from. My main reason for complaing about POTC is that is just too reliant on tired old cliches and boring plot devices and lame Hollywood action. You want good sword-fighting you go see Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. God forbid Hollywood to try to take their action sequences as serious and instead throw an explosion in there. I also think the film tried to cross too many genre boundaries: Adventure, Action, Drama, Horror, Comedy. It may suceed in some but fails in others. It has a nice blend, and something for everyone, but if it was strictly a good, hardline action adventure film then people wouldn't find faults when it tries be over-dramatic, and serious.

[Bondian]

You're funny Bondian and full of surprises and drunk I'll bet! ...sometimes soooo polite and then quite shockingly vulgar!

What happended to 'Sensualist'? Kristian? I noticed lots of regulars are absent. I moved and was offline for two weeks and I'm on dial up for the time being so I don't post as often...

Tarl, baby did you read the post when I said that I would "kill you" if you left CBn?. Now I would kill myself if I didn't leave CBn!.

No, I an not drunk. I have had quite a few nice jobs and have earned a little bit of money. But when your in the mood to be serious and honest, I have to speak my mind even if it'll get me kicked out of here.

Timothy Dalton Bond "I'll thank them for it"!.


All the best,

Cheers,


Ian

[SnakeEyes]

Whoever deletes your posts, you'll scare the living daylights out of them?

I'm not sure I like the 'too English' comment. Just remeber who Bond is, and who I am. I could show you how 'objective' English people can be...

[neversaynever]

Just to get back to the topic for one moment...

God forbid Hollywood to try to take their action sequences as serious and instead throw an explosion in there. I also think the film tried to cross too many genre boundaries: Adventure, Action, Drama, Horror, Comedy. It may suceed in some but fails in others.

I must admit you're right there - it probably does spread itself a little bit thin, and you could criticise it and say it should just "do one thing and do it well". Having said that, I like it - alot!

But I think your comments are well made,

[JackChase007]

It's a fun movie. I enjoyed all aspects of it, although one could easily pick it apart.

[Tarl_Cabot]

Tarl, baby did you read the post when I said that I would "kill you" if you left CBn?. Now I would kill myself if I didn't leave CBn!.


no, Link? I'd never leave CBn for another 007 site. I love my CBn pals around the world!

Nothing wrong with getting a good buzz on after a day's work, I meant no offense laddy(you got me using these Brittish expressions!).
Cheers!

Tarl

[Dmitri Mishkin]

Music wise we've got another 'Hams Zimmer' wannabee. Klaus ( whatever his name is ) does a stellar job of impersonating almost every aspect of 'Gladiator' that it made me want to puke. Why does Hollywood want to continue with the same sound and feeling that was accepted with another movie?. Is this Disney's attempt of something different?.

Hi Ian,

Don't leave CBn just yet. Not without more information. Now -- onto Pirates. I've not seen it, and it seems many really liked this movie (and oddly, the soundtrack). However, I have heard much of the soundtrack and I agree that Klaus Badelt and his team have put together a disappointing mix of cues from The Rock (classic Media Ventures sound) and Gladiator (which was really rather creative, prior to this). It also has to be noted that this was a Disney movie, yes, but a Jerry Bruckheimer Disney movie, a producer known for gravitating toward the contemporary MV sound. He said he didn't want "that old Pirate music", and he wanted a modern sound, so he went to the current soundsmiths for that job. I can't blame him, but I can say to Klaus and friends that it's time for some originality. See John Powell and other more innovative composers for that.

Regards

Phil

[007luvchild2]

I've seen Pirates of the Carribbean. It was okay. Johnny Depp was great, but some moments, he sounds like a lost band member of the Rolling Stones. I really look forward to his scenes, and not the other main characters. It was comedic, adventure, ;just basic brain candy. However, I'm one the few that would probably choose Yellowbeard as one of my Desert Island movies instead.

[JackChase007]

I can't blame him, but I can say to Klaus and friends that it's time for some originality.  See John Powell and other more innovative composers for that.

Ech, that's why I dislike the Media Ventures goons for the most part. I mean, I do honestly enjoy the score to Pirates Of The Caribbean, but I'm very aware that it's a FAR cry from anything original.

And concerning John Powell - I love the man's work! His scores to The Bourne Identity and The Italian Job are very good. I just picked up his score to Paycheck this past weekend and it is AWESOME. I really haven't listened to anything else. What a fun CD!

[Bondian]

I've seen Pirates of the Carribbean. It was okay. Johnny Depp was great, but some moments, he sounds like a lost band member of the Rolling Stones. I really look forward to his scenes, and not the other main characters. It was comedic, adventure, ;just basic brain candy. However, I'm one the few that would probably choose Yellowbeard as one of my Desert Island movies instead.

Here, here honeybun!.

Where's that Island again?.



All the best,

Cheers,


Ian

[007luvchild2]

I would tell but I would have to kill you

Just kidding?

[1q2w3e4r]

Saw the film when I was drunk at the movies. Thought it was funnier than i would have sober. A good night out. Certianlly not the most rubbishful thing Hollywood put out in the last 12 months and Depp was awesome.

Of note, Johnathan Price was in this?? Oh he played her father didn't he? Maybe.

Never rated him anyway look at TND

[Qwerty]

Of note, Johnathan Price was in this?? Oh he played her father didn't he? Maybe.

Yes, that was him.

The only other non-Bond film I've seen him in is Jumping Jack Flash, where he stars as.....Jack!

[trs007]

I can't blame him, but I can say to Klaus and friends that it's time for some originality.  See John Powell and other more innovative composers for that.

Ech, that's why I dislike the Media Ventures goons for the most part. I mean, I do honestly enjoy the score to Pirates Of The Caribbean, but I'm very aware that it's a FAR cry from anything original.

And concerning John Powell - I love the man's work! His scores to The Bourne Identity and The Italian Job are very good. I just picked up his score to Paycheck this past weekend and it is AWESOME. I really haven't listened to anything else. What a fun CD!

One wonders how Alan Silvestri would have handled the project. Shame he was replaced before he even recorded anything, otherwise we might have at least gotten a rejected score out of the project, much like Goldsmith and Timeline.

Edited by trs007, 29 January 2004 - 07:23 PM.

[Genrewriter]

That would have been very interesting. I like Silvestri's work in the Back to the Future films.