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The thrill of the killl

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#1 xboy



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Posted 01 March 2011 - 05:29 AM


Note: This James Bond is based on the movie character, not the true Fleming stories.

The day was Friday, 3 o'clock, only three hours until the day was over. Only three hours left. James Bond was sitting at his wooden desk,moving around on his computer chair. He was- impatient. He clicked his fingers, blew in a big breath before breathing out a big sigh.He was meeting a friend at seven-thirty at Blades, a little reminder of his duel with Le Chiffre. He pulled out his sweaty hands and moved the papers on his desk. He then turned his laptop off and packed it up. How he missed the good old days, he hadn't been on an assignment since Egypt, and that wasn't a success. Everything at the moment didn't seem to go well with him. Felix Leiter was supposedly away, he wasn't answering the phone-calls and the texts, Miss Money-penny had been away with the flu, there was office rumors she had came back today, but he didn't know, M was his grumpy old-self, but Bond would give anything for his cellphone to ring with Miss Moneypenny telling him to go to M's office.

#2 Bryce (003)

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Posted 01 March 2011 - 05:51 PM

Interesting start, but a few pointers that continue to be learned by myself.

Cut to the chase. Narrative and setting is always nice, but pace is even more important. Granted though a fine start and established that Bond is stuck in the office, his last assignment didn't go well and given recent world events, it's timely. Nice touch there IMO.

My one nitpick - If Bond's in his office, why would Moneypenny call him on his mobile? Just sayin'

BTW - I noticed you did a double thread. I'm going to remove the one that didn't get the content.

Sorry if I've come across as nasty schoolmaster, but I always encourage fiction writing and the first steps are the toughest.

Do carry on. ;)

#3 xboy



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Posted 03 March 2011 - 05:23 AM

Bond moved his chair forward and peered into his expresso cup- it was empty.
'How did it go so fast?' Bond thought. He dropped the cup in the trash bin and pushed back in his chair. He thought about asking his secretary, MS. Goodenough for another one, but he was due for a little exercise. He stood up, straightening his tie before heading towards the door into the side-room where his secretary was.
'Leaving so soon?' she asked from her desk. Bond looked up to her, and smiled his rough smile.
'It's the coffee, well more of the lack of it,' he replied,still staring at her. He then turned around, and was heading towards the door.
'Feed the craving'.
'I'll pretend I didn't hear that,' he muttered before shutting the door into the long corridor. He eyed the coffee machine and walked over to it. He slipped some coins into the machine and picked his favourite, black.He grabbed a plastic cup from the collection and held it up to it, ready for the liquid to pour out. He sighed, not much for exercise,- but something to keep him away from the work in his office. The first thing he noticed was the deafening sound of a gun shot, it was loud and it was coming from his office, he perched his head up, alert. He was about to run when a jolt suddenly slammed him into the coffee machine winding him before he dropped onto the floor.

#4 xboy



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Posted 13 March 2011 - 07:46 AM

The first thing Bond realized was that something hot was dripping on to his face. he opened his eyes and winced as he tried to make his vision clear, but then he closed his eyes as another drip hit his noses, then his eyelids. Bond was wondering what it was until a drip hit his open mouth, it was coffee,-black coffee.He opened his eyes again, and his hand pulled up to his face, there was something wet on his hands,-something red.
'Blood,' thought Bond. He pulled himself up, his head felt like a pack of bricks had just dropped on it. Suddenly, his ears adjusted to the sound, absolute chaos. A few secretaries were screaming, another few gunshots- James Bond needed to help out. Bond pulled out his Walther PPK, and stood up.