284 replies to this topic

[MkB]

Sometimes, when I read a piece of news, I can't help thinking "wow, if Fleming had read that, he would have made quite a Bond story of it..." I particularly enjoy the rather absurd premises of some Bond stories (like the Dr No novel).

Doesn't it happen to you?

So here's what I propose to you: come and share here those pieces of news, and maybe some comments on how you think it could fit in a Bond story.

I guess I shall start... so here it is:

Jamaica puzzled by theft of beach

Questions are being asked in Jamaica about a police investigation into the theft of hundreds of tons of sand from a beach on the island's north coast.

See what I mean? Something fishy, undoubtedly... Maybe the beach was stolen to be filtered out to find back some top-secret item, or something in the like. Isn't it a perfect mission for James Bond?

[MkB]

Well, I try to give this thread another chance (really, I'm sure we could come up with something both funny and creative this way!). Maybe this should be in the fan fic forum, though, since all these news are potential plot inspirations...

Diamonds produced from tequila

A method of producing synthetic diamonds using tequila - Mexico's favourite alcoholic drink - has been discovered, scientists there say.

Isn't it a priceless, sooooooo Fleming, piece of news? Can't you imagine how it could fit in a Bond story?

[NotAnAcronym]

Boooooooring.

Give me a call when they start making tequila out of diamonds

[MkB]

Well, I can't believe I am the only one interested in picking up seemingly "other the top" news that would have pleased Ian Fleming and could make it to a James Bond story ... So I give this thread another chance!

'vıagra lure' for Afghan warlords

America's CIA has found a novel way to gain information from fickle Afghan warlords - supplying sex-enhancing drug vıagra, a US media report says.

[ImTheMoneypenny]

Well, I can't believe I am the only one interested in picking up seemingly "other the top" news that would have pleased Ian Fleming and could make it to a James Bond story ... So I give this thread another chance!

'vıagra lure' for Afghan warlords

America's CIA has found a novel way to gain information from fickle Afghan warlords - supplying sex-enhancing drug vıagra, a US media report says.

[darkpath]

Well, I can't believe I am the only one interested in picking up seemingly "other the top" news that would have pleased Ian Fleming and could make it to a James Bond story ... So I give this thread another chance!

'vıagra lure' for Afghan warlords

America's CIA has found a novel way to gain information from fickle Afghan warlords - supplying sex-enhancing drug vıagra, a US media report says.

I can assure you, you're not the only one interested; but I somehow missed this the first two times around. I'll keep my eyes open for items to contribute from now on.

[MkB]

I can assure you, you're not the only one interested; but I somehow missed this the first two times around. I'll keep my eyes open for items to contribute from now on.

That's good to know, Darkpath! I was getting worried But maybe I should have put this thread in the literary discussion rather than in the film one... or better in the fanfic discussion forum!

Anyway, here's a new entry:

By flying car from London to Timbuktu
A voyage to fabled Timbuktu in a flying car may sound like a magical childhood fantasy.
But this week a British adventurer will set off from London on an incredible journey through Europe and Africa in a souped-up sand buggy, travelling by road - and air.
With the help of a parachute and a giant fan-motor, Neil Laughton plans to soar over the Pyrenees near Andorra, before taking to the skies again to hop across the 14-km (nine-mile) Straits of Gibraltar.
The ex-SAS officer then aims to fly over the Atlas Mountains in Morocco, above stretches of the Sahara desert and, well, wherever else the road runs out.
But forget Chitty Chitty Bang Bang - this flying machine is based on proven technology.

To be contnued here: http://news.bbc.co.u...ica/7821979.stm

Hmmm... An ex-SAS officer going to exotic location in a flying car, invented by a genius boffin... As Bond as it gets, isn't it?

[Eurospy]

I'm terribly sorry for missing this one before - excellent topic

I just love these news you've been posting.

Can't say I have much to contribute at the moment, I try to give up on news (impossible, obviously) since I was becoming rather pessimistic towards society. Have cut back on the news, but still feel pessimistic. Hm... maybe it's not just from watching the news.

But do keep us posted, I'm loving it - double

I'll post something soon as I find something that may fit here.

[Scrambled Eggs]

I can assure you, you're not the only one interested; but I somehow missed this the first two times around. I'll keep my eyes open for items to contribute from now on.

That's good to know, Darkpath! I was getting worried But maybe I should have put this thread in the literary discussion rather than in the film one... or better in the fanfic discussion forum!

Anyway, here's a new entry:

By flying car from London to Timbuktu
A voyage to fabled Timbuktu in a flying car may sound like a magical childhood fantasy.
But this week a British adventurer will set off from London on an incredible journey through Europe and Africa in a souped-up sand buggy, travelling by road - and air.
With the help of a parachute and a giant fan-motor, Neil Laughton plans to soar over the Pyrenees near Andorra, before taking to the skies again to hop across the 14-km (nine-mile) Straits of Gibraltar.
The ex-SAS officer then aims to fly over the Atlas Mountains in Morocco, above stretches of the Sahara desert and, well, wherever else the road runs out.
But forget Chitty Chitty Bang Bang - this flying machine is based on proven technology.

To be contnued here: http://news.bbc.co.u...ica/7821979.stm

Hmmm... An ex-SAS officer going to exotic location in a flying car, invented by a genius boffin... As Bond as it gets, isn't it?

I saw the improbably named Giles Cardozo interviewed about his invention the other day. It looks great fun.

Here's something to make Die Another Day fans say "Told you so":

Science closing in on cloak of invisibility

4 hours ago

WASHINGTON (AP) — They can't match Harry Potter yet, but scientists are moving closer to creating a real cloak of invisibility.

Researchers at Duke University, who developed a material that can "cloak" an item from detection by microwaves, report that they have expanded the number of wavelengths they can block.

In 2006 the team reported they had developed so-called metamaterials that could deflect microwaves around a three-dimensional object, essentially making it invisible to the waves.

The system works like a mirage, where heat causes the bending of light rays and cloaks the road ahead behind an image of the sky.

The researchers report in Thursday's edition of the journal Science that they have developed a series of mathematical commands to guide the development of more types of metamaterials to cloak objects from an increasing range of electromagnetic waves.

"The new device can cloak a much wider spectrum of waves — nearly limitless — and will scale far more easily to infrared and visible light. The approach we used should help us expand and improve our abilities to cloak different types of waves," senior researcher David R. Smith said in a statement.

The new cloak is made up of more than 10,000 individual pieces of fiberglass arranged in parallel rows. The mathematical formulas are used to determine the shape and placement of each piece to deflect the electromagnetic waves.

The research was supported by Raytheon Missile Systems, the Air Force Office of Scientific Research, InnovateHan Technology, the National Science Foundation of China, the National Basic Research Program of China and National Science Foundation of Jiangsu Province, China.

http://www.google.co...hBR4HAD95NPNO82

[MkB]

That's a good one, Scrambled Eggs!

Here's another one in today's news: this pilot performed a very "007 in New York" landing... Kudos to the pilot who saved the day, Capt. Chesley B. 'Sully' Sullenberger!

Airbus crashes in New York river



A US airliner on a domestic flight with 155 people aboard has ditched into the Hudson River in New York City but with no loss of life.
(...)

Another one, quite different, as a tribute to the "roseate spoonbill" birds that were mysteriously disappearing from Dr No's island

Mystery of the British penguins that are marching towards oblivion



An endangered species of penguin is mysteriously disappearing from a remote British island in the South Atlantic at a rate of 100 birds every day. About two million northern rockhopper penguins have vanished from Tristan da Cunha and Gough Island, part of the British overseas territory of St Helena, in half a century.
(...)

[Eurospy]

Absolutely love this thread.

The cloak of invisiblity is rather close to the premise of a thriller novel by the name "World Without End", published years ago.

[Turn]

I just noticed in today's paper in the "This Day in History" column this is the anniversary of a not-well-known situation that occurred very similar to Thunderball.

In 1966, A U.S. Air Force B-52 carrying four unarmed hydrogen bombs crashed on the Spanish coast. Three of the four bombs were quickly recovered, but the fourth wasn't found until April.

I recall reading about that situation in the book "The James Bond Films" and hadn't thought about it much since. TB had only been out for a few weeks. I wonder if it helped its box office take all?

[MkB]

Some of us have already suggested that the Somalian piracy could be an interesting ground for a future Bond film (which is not absurd, since, though other-the-top, the plots tend to be connected with the current news / geopolitics).

I found this article interesting... It's about not only the Somalian piracy, but the very discreet law firms that, in London, specialize in the negociation with pirates in those cases of kidnapp and ransom at sea (and also the very down-to-earth issue of how to deliver the ransom to the pirates).

http://news.bbc.co.u...ine/7847351.stm

When you consider that Somalian pirates pocketed about $50m last year, with an average ranson of $1 - 2$m, you can see it's a pretty big business (for the pirates, but certainly also for the law firms who negociate with them).

I really think it could provide an interesting plot for a Bond film... Say, the pirates hijack a boat they really shouldn't (like they did recently with a boat loaded with tanks) and Bond is acting undercover as one of the lawyers in charge of the negociations, then he discovers that there are some more complicated things at stake (i.e. the pirates and the ransom are used as pawns in an international money-laundering game, involving one of those law firms), etc. etc. Many possibilities, with a plot connected to recent news and geopolitics, and some potential action scenes at sea with SBS (and even Harry Fawkes absailing from a chopper )!

[darkpath]

Somehow, I've been having trouble getting this topic to come up in my searches for the last few weeks. I'd meant to link to stories about an alleged bio- or chemical- weapon that either Al Qaeda is testing on their own personnel or which they lost containment of. It seems like the exact sort of doomsday plot that 007 (especially in the Moore days) would be sent to thwart. Unfortunately, given the delay, I've lost track of the source stories. My apologies. I'll try to locate them again.

[MkB]

Somehow, I've been having trouble getting this topic to come up in my searches for the last few weeks. I'd meant to link to stories about an alleged bio- or chemical- weapon that either Al Qaeda is testing on their own personnel or which they lost containment of. It seems like the exact sort of doomsday plot that 007 (especially in the Moore days) would be sent to thwart. Unfortunately, given the delay, I've lost track of the source stories. My apologies. I'll try to locate them again.

Interesting indeed! Was it this story?
Al-Qaeda cell killed by Black Death 'was developing biological weapons'

It happened in Algeria some days ago: 40 terrorists were reported killed by the plague at an Al Qaeda training camp... Creepy, isn't it? If only it was just in a Bond film instead of real life...

[MkB]

This one is not a proper piece of news, but an ad I saw while surfing on some newspapers' websites:

http://www.dnaancestryproject.com
This project proposes you to test your ancestry, by analyzing your DNA. You register, they send you a "kit" to collect yourself your DNA sample, and you send the sample back to them. The beauty of it is that you pay for it ($119 to $199)! I'm sure no police or secret service in the world ever dreamed of having people pay to enter a DNA database, but those guys achieved it!
I really find it crazy... Sending voluntarily your DNA sample to a private institution, and being happy to pay for that, no, really?

Anyway, wouldn't it be a nice plot premise for a bond story? The Villain's organization (SPECTRE-like) is trying to establish a worldwide DNA database, to sell some samples to other intelligence/terrorism organizations or use them for some other criminal purpose (eugenism/nazi-like plot?), undercover of this harmless "genealogical" project publicized over the Net...

[MkB]

http://news.bbc.co.u...ews/7892294.stm

Nuclear subs 'collide in ocean'

A Royal Navy nuclear submarine was involved in a collision with a French nuclear sub in the middle of the Atlantic, it has been reported.

It is understood HMS Vanguard and Le Triomphant were badly damaged in the crash earlier this month.

Despite being equipped with sonar, it seems neither vessel spotted the other, the BBC's Caroline Wyatt said.

The UK's Ministry of Defence is not commenting on the reports, but insisted nuclear security had not been breached.

Our defence correspondent said HMS Vanguard, with "very visible dents and scrapes", had to be towed back into its home base at Faslane on the Firth of Clyde. The submarines were both "seriously-armed", she also said.

The alleged incident is being investigated on both sides of the Channel, she said.

The two submarines are key parts of each nation's nuclear deterrent, and would have been carrying missiles, though both the UK and France have insisted there was no danger of a nuclear incident.

The two 150m-long (492ft) submarines were carrying around 240 sailors between them. A French naval spokesman said the collision did not result in any injuries to the crew.

HMS Vanguard is now back at Faslane.

Funny, isn't it? The Atlantic isn't large enough for two nuclear subs not to collide? I can see the SPECTRE of bad luck behind this...

[Scrambled Eggs]

Funny, isn't it? The Atlantic isn't large enough for two nuclear subs not to collide? I can see the SPECTRE of bad luck behind this...

What are you implying? That you see the hand of some diabolical international organisation in this affair?

Nonsense.

What has actually happened here is that the French Navy have deployed their much rumoured MEGA sub, "Le Gastronome" to swallow one of ours through it's mighty bow doors. They mean to steal the secrets of British submarine design. It was ordered by Carla Bruni herself.

See how our chaps foil their feeble efforts?

[MkB]

What has actually happened here is that the French Navy have deployed their much rumoured MEGA sub, "Le Gastronome" to swallow one of ours through it's mighty bow doors. They mean to steal the secrets of British submarine design.

Actually, the French Navy almost succeeded. They managed to get that close to the British sub without being noticed, but fortunately, when "Le Gastronome" opened its jaws to swallow good ol' HMS Vanguard, there was such a horrible smell of garlic that the anti-chemical weapons alarm was activated on the sub... Just in time!
At least that's what I heard from some well-informed officials rumoured to be quite close to Carla Bruni...

[ACE]

http://www.space.com...-collision.html

M: 007, do you realise the gravity of the situation?
JB: Ma'am, I don't think there is any gravity beyond the Van Allen belt.
M: Your levity is misplaced. It seems Quantum can now iradicate satellites by causing "accidental collisions". Christ, everything from our GPS to our ICBMs could be neutralised.
JB: Hmmm, enough to bring anyone down to Earth.


http://news.bbc.co.u...cas/7487026.stm

M: 007, do you realise the level of danger to this job?
JB: High as Columbian pure.
M: The Kwanzaki Cartel has captured our best operative. It is imperative the extraction is successful.
JB: 100%, Ma'am. A drugs must, if you will.

[darkpath]

Somehow, I've been having trouble getting this topic to come up in my searches for the last few weeks. I'd meant to link to stories about an alleged bio- or chemical- weapon that either Al Qaeda is testing on their own personnel or which they lost containment of. It seems like the exact sort of doomsday plot that 007 (especially in the Moore days) would be sent to thwart. Unfortunately, given the delay, I've lost track of the source stories. My apologies. I'll try to locate them again.

Interesting indeed! Was it this story?
Al-Qaeda cell killed by Black Death 'was developing biological weapons'

It happened in Algeria some days ago: 40 terrorists were reported killed by the plague at an Al Qaeda training camp... Creepy, isn't it? If only it was just in a Bond film instead of real life...

Yes, that was it, exactly! Thank you!

[Jim]

This may of course end in tragedy for those affected and the man himself, but there's a whiff of splendid Bond villainy here:

http://news.bbc.co.u...cas/7898569.stm

Texan banking magnate awarded dubious knighthood, with links to the West Indies (location!) and an inevitable fatal flaw - a soft spot for cricket and cricketers' wives/girlfriends. Bringing back the glories of "Bond and villain play a game", Bond infiltrates the English greedy bastards/Twenty20 cricket squad. Depending on the actor, Bond would be:-

(a. some sort of Scotsman (admittedly not a nation known for its cricket).
(b. some sort of Australian (admittedly not a nation known for its cricket).
(c. a stylish, Gower-esque dilletante, ready with a quip and a bottle of something splendid at the end of the day's play; everyone's fondness disguising the nagging suspicion that he may just have been very, very lucky and charm covers over a tendency towards daft choices and silly crapness now and again.
(d. someone who takes it all terribly seriously and misses the point by a country mile and, in understanding his motivation, imagines himself as the ball.
(e. a populist, aged fat boy living off past glories albeit tremendously successful to start with - think Botham at Durham.
(f. a deadly demon bowler who celebrates each wicket by kebabbing the unfortunate batsman on a splintered stump and then kicking the umpire to death (but who hurts inside, oh the torment).

Laugh! As Bond "bowls a maiden over". Fnarr.
Laugh again! at "Fine leg" and "Gully" and "The bowler's Holding, the batsman's Willey" etc.
Cry! When the film stops for tea.
Snore! As the climax goes on for five days without evident resolution.
Thrill! To the sight of Daniel Craig in a cricket box. Oh, I say.
Eat! Some nice cake.
Hum along! To the theme tune - "Oh Aggers, stop it...". Dirty Vegas mix.
Inflict! Your inane view and upsetting spelling upon the members of message boards for months with your observations upon the incredible set pieces:-

- the tension of the bad light meter sequence - will the third light go on or not? (it were all shakeycam, i do'nt like it)
- the amazing "it looks like rain" stunt sequence ("THEY COPIED IT FROM THE BOURNE FILMS THE GIMPS")
- the slo-mo bail tumbling ("that wasn't the original ending i can prove that they got it wrong")
- the terrifying Duckworth-Lewis sequence ("This film is a disaster because the exchange rate against the seat ratio against the girth of my ego means it is, don't you know anything?")
- the state of the outfield ("this wouldn't have happened in Ken Adddams' day; just saying, don't get at me.")
- the brilliantly edited coin toss ("I couldn't make out what was going on and I obviously need to draw the film from memory so it's a bad film because I can't do that for some unfathomable reason")

James Bond 007
in

"Corridors of Uncertainty"

Coming soon to a cinema near you. Run! Maybe two!

DVD commentary by Blofeld. Henry Blofeld. And Christopher Martin-Scaramanga.

[MkB]

Wow Jim, I hadn't realized this Sir Allen had such a potential as a Bond villain! Splendidly spotted!

[ACE]

This may of course end in tragedy for those affected and the man himself, but there's a whiff of splendid Bond villainy here:

http://news.bbc.co.u...cas/7898569.stm

Texan banking magnate awarded dubious knighthood, with links to the West Indies (location!) and an inevitable fatal flaw - a soft spot for cricket and cricketers' wives/girlfriends. Bringing back the glories of "Bond and villain play a game", Bond infiltrates the English greedy bastards/Twenty20 cricket squad. Depending on the actor, Bond would be:-

(a. some sort of Scotsman (admittedly not a nation known for its cricket).
(b. some sort of Australian (admittedly not a nation known for its cricket).
(c. a stylish, Gower-esque dilletante, ready with a quip and a bottle of something splendid at the end of the day's play; everyone's fondness disguising the nagging suspicion that he may just have been very, very lucky and charm covers over a tendency towards daft choices and silly crapness now and again.
(d. someone who takes it all terribly seriously and misses the point by a country mile and, in understanding his motivation, imagines himself as the ball.
(e. a populist, aged fat boy living off past glories albeit tremendously successful to start with - think Botham at Durham.
(f. a deadly demon bowler who celebrates each wicket by kebabbing the unfortunate batsman on a splintered stump and then kicking the umpire to death (but who hurts inside, oh the torment).

Laugh! As Bond "bowls a maiden over". Fnarr.
Laugh again! at "Fine leg" and "Gully" and "The bowler's Holding, the batsman's Willey" etc.
Cry! When the film stops for tea.
Snore! As the climax goes on for five days without evident resolution.
Thrill! To the sight of Daniel Craig in a cricket box. Oh, I say.
Eat! Some nice cake.
Hum along! To the theme tune - "Oh Aggers, stop it...". Dirty Vegas mix.
Inflict! Your inane view and upsetting spelling upon the members of message boards for months with your observations upon the incredible set pieces:-

- the tension of the bad light meter sequence - will the third light go on or not? (it were all shakeycam, i do'nt like it)
- the amazing "it looks like rain" stunt sequence ("THEY COPIED IT FROM THE BOURNE FILMS THE GIMPS")
- the slo-mo bail tumbling ("that wasn't the original ending i can prove that they got it wrong")
- the terrifying Duckworth-Lewis sequence ("This film is a disaster because the exchange rate against the seat ratio against the girth of my ego means it is, don't you know anything?")
- the state of the outfield ("this wouldn't have happened in Ken Adddams' day; just saying, don't get at me.")
- the brilliantly edited coin toss ("I couldn't make out what was going on and I obviously need to draw the film from memory so it's a bad film because I can't do that for some unfathomable reason")

James Bond 007
in

"Corridors of Uncertainty"

Coming soon to a cinema near you. Run! Maybe two!

DVD commentary by Blofeld. Henry Blofeld. And Christopher Martin-Scaramanga.

ROTFLMAO! Jim.

Yeah, and, like Barnd could have a fight in a Ken Adam version of the cricket museum at the Lord's Pavilion. And he could, like, smash up the display cases. And he could, like, knock out a villain with a cricket bat, after which Barnd's cricket loving contact played by Sachin Tendulkar enters the room.

Sachin: "What happened to him?"
Barnd: "He was on a sticky wicket!"

Perhaps the redhead and blonde henchpersons could be called "Blood" and "Custard"!

[Vauxhall]

Fantastic Jim. The concept of a Test Match Special action adventure brings me out in all sorts of excitement. Geoff Boycott will be revelling in the prospect of surpassing the acting panache displayed by Fred Truman in that Dad's Army episode...

Just read that Stanford is apparently "missing" after failing to hire a private jet to Antigua when his credit card was declined. Wonder if they've checked Pinewood.

[Jim]

Perhaps the redhead and blonde henchpersons could be called "Blood" and "Custard"!

Or "Leather" and "Willow"

"Ah, the sound of leather on willow."
or
"Ladies, I'm afraid I shall have to enforce the follow-on".
or
"Line and length, darling. Line and length."
or
"Somedays it's floppy, and some days my headgear is hard. Would you like to touch my helmet?"
or
"You sound like an experienced all-rounder to me."
or
"You always appeal to me."
or
"I prefer to come around the wicket."
or
"What's the asking rate?"
or
"I admire your backlift."
or
"You certainly did bang that one in with force, my dear."
or
"I always did enjoy your Bodyline."
or
"I once tossed a Chinaman after tea."
or
"I'm extremely interested by your corridor of uncertainty."
or
"Let me examine your crease."
or
"Excuse me, darling. Must follow-through."
or
"I prefer French. Cricket. Amongst other things."
or
"Hmm; front foot contact. Cheeky."
or
"Full toss or beamer?"
or
"I give you very best duck. Golden duck. Bit like a golden shower. But with a duck."
or
"Mind my googly."
or
"Watch that slip, and guard your gully."
or
"Leg glance. But a glance was enough for that leg."
or
"I think he likes to reverse swing."
or
"I'm sure he's a tail-ender. I mean, look at that walk."



"Goodbye, Mr Bond." "No, leg-bye actually."


Blimey; this scriptwriting lark's easy, innit?

[MkB]

Looks like Leiter beat James Bond on that Sir allen case:
http://news.bbc.co.u...cas/7900666.stm

[danielcraigisjamesbond007]

Finally, a flying car. I kid you not...


http://buzz.yahoo.com/buzzlog/92384

[darkpath]

I'd say this story about a network of computers being used to attack and infiltrate secure systems would qualify; but might be too politically charged for EON's tastes:
http://www.nytimes.c...logy/29spy.html

[MkB]

Two pieces of news caught my eye today.

First, a fire at EU headquarters due to a fire in the basement (certainly the place where they hold their top-secret information )

EU offices evacuated due to fire

Hundreds of people have been evacuated after a fire broke out in the basement of the headquarters of the European Commission in Brussels, officials say.

http://news.bbc.co.u...ope/8055637.stm

Second, a rather silly piece of news, and certainly too political for Bond, but... apparently General Franco "physical defect" would confirm Fleming's views about twisted Villains (and really, no offence to all men with one testicle, there's nothing wrong with that, it's just a silly piece of news that ties up funnily with Fleming's silly caricature of Villains)

Spain's Franco 'had one testicle'

A new book claims the Spanish dictator, General Francisco Franco, may have had more in common with Adolf Hitler than previously known - having one testicle.

http://news.bbc.co.u...ope/8055329.stm

That's all for today, folks!