24 replies to this topic

[Skudor]

I'll be picking the winner sometime next weekend. Until then, get cracking!!!

[Blofeld's Cat]

"The name's Sparrow, Jack Sparrow"

[00Twelve]

Yo ho ho and a bottle of Scotch.

[dinovelvet]

Sean got the wrong idea when he heard that pirate DVDs are where the money is.

[dinovelvet]

"PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN IV : MILKING THE FRANCHISE DRY" introduces Jack Sparrow's deadliest nemesis yet - Captain Jock Sporran. Legendary actor Sean Connery says of the film "Well the role ish fantashtic and the shcript is one of the besht I've ever read. Oh and the $30 million check wash pretty good too. Hey, don't print that lasht part".

[solace]

[/quote]


Livid at losing the Clown scene to Roger Moore, connery takes Bond in the direction he wanted from the beginning.

"Names Bond Jim-Lad Bond!! Ha Harrr!

[Conlazmoodalbrocra]

After stating how he'd love to play a Bond villain, Sean Connery was delighted when the producers came up with a cracking idea...

[Loomis]

Always a frugal man, Sir Sean usually avoids buying new clothes. "Most of what I wear has been in the family for generations," he explains, "but my attitude is, if it still hangs together, I'll wear it."

[Skudor]

Some cracking stuff - keep 'em coming!

[sharpshooter]

I'll be picking the winner sometime next weekend. Until then, get cracking!!!

Sean Connery. A Scot against film piracy. With a taste for the theatrical.

[George Lazenby]

Mi6

[Mister Asterix]

Never say never

[Bryce (003)]

"Well...It's a damn side more comfortable than the kilt....You gotta problem with that?"

[Jim]

The Hunt for Red Arrctober

or

"Where's my career, children?" "It's behind you!"

or

Accused of ill-thought-through tax-exile political nothingness, Sean Connery displays his love for his homeland* by wearing its ancient national dress.

*The Bahamas.

or

When the pictures of the Connery cameo in Indiana Jones 4 hit the internet, "people" were so horrified they stopped complaining about the aliens, the incest scene and that bit with the badger.

[Skudor]

I've already spotted a couple of potential winners - but nothing is settled so keep them coming hrarr hrarr!

[Judo chop]

<Connery to costume designer>

[Conlazmoodalbrocra]

After Keith Richards proved such a hit with the fans, the producers of Pirates 4 brought in Sean Connery to play Jack Sparrow's uncle Jock.

[Daddy Bond]

I'll be picking the winner sometime next weekend. Until then, get cracking!!!

Turned down for the role of Peter Pan, Sir Sean tries out for the role of Captain Hook.

[Bondian]

Connery "this never happened to the other feather".

Or

Oh, better far to live and die
Under the brave black party flag I fly,
Than play a sanctimonious part,
With a pirate head and a well groomed tart.
Away to the cheating world go you,
Where pirates all are well-to-do;
But I

[just another 00]

The Highlander franchise has gone a little far don't you think?

[james st.john smythe]

arrrrrgh im going to me cabin to beat me wife, arrrrgh

[Mr. Blofeld]

"Hello. My name is Juan S

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[Airrider]

An excerpt from the EON Productions' "reboot" of Pirates of the Caribbean..

Major Boothroyd: Nice and light...on a lady's bodice.
M: Any comment, 007?
James Bond: I disagree, sir. I've carried the matchlock for ten years, and I've never missed with it.
M: No, but it fizzled out on you last job, and you spent six months in hospital in consequence. When you carry a 00 number, you have a license to kill, not get killed. Furthermore, since I've been on the Council of Pirate Lords, there's been a forty percent drop in casualties, and I want to keep it that way. From now on you carry a flintlock... unless you'd rather return to standard buccaneering.
James Bond: No sir, I would not.
M: Show him, Armourer.
Major Boothroyd: Flintlock pistol, 58-caliber, with a delivery like a 6-pounder through a galleon's side. Captain Sao Fang's crew swears by them.

Edited by Airrider, 10 May 2008 - 01:12 AM.

[Skudor]

Lots of funnies this time - special mentions go to Bondian for putting a tune to the picture and to Jim for sheer volume of funnies in one post. But the winner is dinovelvet for this witticism:

Sean got the wrong idea when he heard that pirate DVDs are where the money is.

[dinovelvet]

Thanks, Sku (or is it 'Dor?). More Seanage coming your way later today!