7 replies to this topic

[Icephoenix]

It such a great joke gotta share it...

>>sitting on a little perch. >> >>It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says >>aloud; "Jeesh. I wonder what happened to this Parrot?" >> >>The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective >>parrot." >> >>"Holy s***," the guy replies. "You actually understood >>and answered me!" >> >>"I got every word," says the parrot. "I happen to be a >>highly intelligent, thoroughly educated bird." >> >>"Oh yeah?", the guy asks, "Then answer this -- how do >>you hang on to your perch without any feet?" >> >>"Well," the parrot says, "this is very embarrassing >>but since you asked, I wrap my willie around this >>wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it >>because of my feathers." >> >>"Wow" says the guy, "you really can understand and >>speak English, can't you!?" >> >>"Actually, I speak both Spanish and English and I can >>converse with reasonable competence on almost any >>topic: politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy. >>I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought >>to buy me. I'd be a great companion." >> >>The guy looks at the $200 price tag. "Sorry, but I just >>can't afford that." >> >>"Pssssssst" says the parrot, "I'm defective, so the >>truth is, nobody wants me cause I don't have any feet. >>You can probably get me for $20, just make the guy an >>offer!" >> >>The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot. >>Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great >>sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he >>understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's >>insightful. >> >>The guy is delighted. One day the guy comes home from >>work and the parrot goes "Psssssssssssst" and motions >>him over with one wing. "I don't know if I should tell >>you this or not, but it's about your wife and the postman." >> >>"What are you talking about?" asks the guy. >> >>"When the postman delivered today, your wife greeted >>him at the door in a sheer black nighty and kissed him >>passionately." >> >>"WHAT???" the guy asks incredulously. >> >>"THEN what happened?" >> >>"Well, then the postman came into the house and lifted >>up her nighty and began petting her all over" reported >>the parrot. >> >>"My God!" he exclaims. "Then what?" >> >>"Then he lifted up the nighty, got down on his knees >>and began to lick her all over, starting with her >>breasts and slowly going down..." >> >>"WELL???" demands the frantic guy, "THEN WHAT >>HAPPENED?" >> >>"Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch."

[James Page]

Great stuff! That one's gone round the office.

OK, how about my favourite one of the moment:

"What do you call an artist with a brown finger?"





















"Picasso"!

[Evil Doctor Cheese]

LOVE IT!

That's really cheered me up Trevelyan!

[walther]

I think I may have heard this one before but it's a great one! Good Job!

[Blofeld's Cat]

I've always liked horny birds.

[Blue Eyes]

Gee I dont' know if I'm allowed to leave this stuff, but what the heck

[Dr. Tynan]

Very good.

[RossMan]

Thanks for sharing it with everybody, just lovely.