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[Genrewriter]

008: Exploding cats? Why I would never have guessed!

004: Cut the smart talk and get out of there, doofus!

008 whistles to 003 and signals for him to get out.

003: Got it!

008 looks to 002.

008: Find a gas line.

002: We don't have time for-

008: Trust me! We don't find one, we're gonna have cats up our butts the rest of the day!

002: Nice imagery.

008 smiles and looks around the cabin, finding a kitchen.

008: Cover me.

002 nods as 008 runs to the kitchen. He finds the stove and yanks out the gas line. He goes to the drawers and gets some tun foil, shoving it in the microwave. He turns it on and shoots out a window in the kitchen.

008: Bryce, Xen, get out of there!

008 leaps through the window as the microwave goes off.

In the hall, 002 runs for the door, leaping over some cats and using others as stepping stones as she makes her escape.

003 and Asiaq exit through the back door and run as the cabin explodes.

004 and 009 duck as bits of fur fly overhead. They look up and see 008 and the others standing in the debris.

004: Always something with 008, hmm?

009: He does tend to blow through things.

008 walks up to them.

008: OK, what's next?

009: Getting in the car would be a good start.

[Joyce Carrington]

She runs over to her car, gets in, and flies it towards the others.

009: Get in, before more of them get here.

The other agents start climbing into the car.

[Bryce (003)]

"Drives up" as I recall dear, your BMW is grounded since the tampering incident at the pipeline.

*Bryce spins keeping Asiaq behind him as he rips off 20+ rounds at the advancing felines. Four explode sending fur everywhere*

Bad Kitty!

*turns to Asiaq with a raised eyebrow*

Good Kitty? *Asiaq appears to be very near shock. Eyes wide, she just keeps tugging on Bryce's belt pulling him back*

*009's car skids to a stop near the group*

Closing Time! Last call!

I hope the ASPCA doesn't hear about this.

*Bryce puts Asiaq in the back and hops in reloading his MP5 and hurling two HE incendiary grenades at the fur balls*

[Matt O'S oo4]

Sighting in on verious cats in a strategic manner, 004 opens fire and continues to fire, blasting cats into pate. As each cat detonates, it set off a few of them nearby, keeping the wave from advancing for the moment.

The explosions are quite...invigorating.

004: I gotta get some of these for parties over at MI5.

[Bryce (003)]

Perfect for "Bring your pet to work" day at 'five.

003: Matt - use the "heavy loads" and get your butt to Joyce's wheels!

*both of 003's grenades blow sending fur everywhere*

[Matt O'S oo4]

With pleasure!

004 quickly changes clips and, in a matter of 12 seconds, empties 30 rounds on the cats, hitting 28 of them.

004, tuning down the starlight scope: That gets a bit bright, after a fashion.

Hooking on to the tree, he does a short version of a bungee down, while slipping in a new clip, flipping over, landing on his feet and the bungee detaches automatically.

I hope that like THESE LOADS.

004 takes aim and fires another round. The flame out the end of his rifle barrel jumps 12 inches, despite the flash supressor.

The impact scatters cats back, like a small grenade. The kick of the gun is.....impressive.

004: Thanks a lot Q. I call these rounds Shoulder Killers. Arg. Ah...what the hell....

Running to 009's vehicle, he continues to lay out grazing fire, keeping the advancing animals from gaining additional ground on the retreating 00 group.

I never was a cat person. Why couldn't it be dogs? Dogs are so much more fun. Ah, well.

[Bryce (003)]

*Bryce jumps out of car and lays down a heavy barrage of automatic fire covering 004 and pitches his last two HE grenades*

003: Damn cats! Matt! Over here!

*slaps in a new clip and keeps a steady stream of hot 9mm flying*

Wankers!

[Matt O'S oo4]

Ah, me.

Looks like it just about that time again.

JOYCE! POP THE TRUNK!!

Running to her cars boot, he places the rifle in and pulls out his AM/FM/CD Player.

003 looks over at him. His jaw drops a bit.

004, looking back: OH, YEAH! OH, YEAH!

[Bryce (003)]

**** YEAH!

The "BOOM" box!

Play some John Barry for the little buggers!...and let them try a few CD's

*Bryce actually relaxes and lights a smoke*

[Xenobia]

*Xenobia smiles warmly*

002: Good evening ladies, gentlemen, and felines. BBC Radio One is proud to present a special broadcast of John Barry's Thunderball. Take that you wanker fur balls!

-- Xenobia

[Matt O'S oo4]

004, shoulder the unit and after touching the stop and play key together, the "getto-blaster" transforms. A eye viewy unit slides out of the left side and the end of the boom-box open up and extends slightly.


Taking aim, 004 touches the fast-forward and rewind keys at once.

For those who have not seen the box in action (003 is smiling, with his fingers in his ears) this is an E-Ticket ride. The minature stinger missle launches and strikes the ground where 004 has directed it, blasting at least 70 cats back, the concussion pitches many more off balance and into disarray.

Jumping into 009's car, he depresses the replay option key to reload.

004: Just in case.

[Genrewriter]

*008 glances back at the carnage and smiles. He turns to 004.*

008: And I'm naturally destructive?

004: Yes, you are. Take us out of here, 009.

*009 smiles.*

009: My pleasure.

*She floors the accelerator and peels away. As she does, 003 and 008 glance back.*

008: Oh-

003:-Hell.

[Bryce (003)]

GET SOME!

*Bryce unloads 65 round clip from his MP5. Anything still on four paws is quickly being chopped up.*

003: *still blasting* G, care to join me?

[Joyce Carrington]

009, being frustrated behind the wheel: Speed up, you damn thing!

003: Women and driving...

*009 throws him her shoe*

009: It won't go any faster!

[Matt O'S oo4]

Reeeealy?

Just a second.

Let's change the beat.

004 lift his little radio up on his shoulder.

I'd advise everone to...um...get down.

004 touches a sequence of touch keys on his panel.

The viewy slides out and BOTH ends of his blaster open up.

Looking at 009: Keep it steady for just a moment. Hang on everyone, I haven't tried one of these before.

003: You mean........?

004 nods: White flash and all. Hang on to something. It's directional and loud as hell...so Q tells me.

004 pesses the key.....

[Bryce (003)]

*Bryce ducks and covers Asiaq - also delivering a blast from his Halothane lighter - she slumps*

I just don't want you vanishing until we've talked luv.

[Matt O'S oo4]

as the missle is launched, 004 dives under as far as is possible.

009's BMW is moving away with haste as the miniature RPG hits its target. A small rumble begins to slowly make the BMW vibrate but 009 holds it on the road.

004: Everyone, close you eyes! Even if it's just for a second!

A bright white flash in the rear of the car, like the reflection of the sun in your face, then a wave of heat precedes a great explosion as the BMW rounds a corner, evading the brunt of the blast.

004: I think I need a drink. Maybe two.

[Joyce Carrington]

Me too!

*eyes widen*

There is a cat stuck beneath the bonnet! It's destroying my car!

*eyes turn red*

NO-ONE messes with MY car!

*looks at 002*

Here sweetie, take the wheel.

*climbs out of window and onto bonnet*

[Matt O'S oo4]

Looks at 003.

004: You've got to be kidding me. She hasn't been a 00 THAT long...has she? *004 pulls out his berreta* God I love that wonam.

[Joyce Carrington]

The agents watch as 009 jumps onto the bonnet, grabs the cat and starts wrestling with it, banging its furry white head against the windscreen. She screams several words at the animal which I will not be naming right here.

002: Oh...

003: Wow.

*008 looks at 004*

008: Is that normal for her?

[Genrewriter]

004: Depends on the situation.

*008 nods, glancing back.*

008: Nobody behind us, I think we're clear.

002: Not exactly, G.

008: What do you mean?

*Suddenly, a blast of machine gun fire comes from above. 008 sticks his head out the window and sees a helicopter following them.*

008: Point taken.

[Xenobia]

002: I knew it was a mistake to give the Flying Circus their own licences. (calls out to 009) Turn the cat so it is facing me!

009: Why?

002: Because I am going to hold up a photo of Insult the Comic Dog to scare it! *rollseyes* Just do it!

*009 does so and Xenobia holds up the pendant she had been wearing. It lets off a flash just bright enough to temporarily blind the kitty. Joyce takes advantage of the situation and breaks the cat's neck, before throwing it away*

002: There, end of that CATastrophophe, now, (turns to 004) I don't suppose there's anything left in that radio of yours?

-- Xenobia

[Genrewriter]

*008 taps 002 on the shoulder.*

008: Uh, I got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?

002: The good.

008: The helicopter isn't shooting anymore.

002: The bad.

008: It's dropping more kitties onto the road.

*002 looks as an exploding kitty goes off near the car.*

002: This could get ugly.

[Joyce Carrington]

*009 looks at 002*

Thanks for covering for me... but MOVE OVER!

*009 pushes her out of the drivers' seat and climbs back in through the window*

Okay, now that I have saved my car...

*presses a few buttons on the dashboard*

002: What are you doing?

009: I installed a skeet-shooting mechanism on the roof once... we can use it to get the cats off.

002: Right.

*002 grabs her rifle and sticks it out of the window*

002: PULL!

[Genrewriter]

*008 looks to Matt.*

008: I'll take the helicopter. Just sit back and relax.

004: Oh, may I?

*008 leans out the window and fires at the helicopt6er, blowing out the side window.*

002: PULL!

*Falling kitties explode as 002 fires at them. 003 and 008 join in, picking off two almost simultaneously.*

003: Mine went first.

008: Yeah, just keep telling yourself that.

[Joyce Carrington]

009: Boys... no fighting... that's the last thing we need right now. What can you do about that darn helicopter?

008 (irritated): It's not like we're TRYING!

009: Just hurry.

002: PULL!

[Genrewriter]

*008 takes a deep breath and fires at the helicopter.*

008: Damn, I can't aim in this thing.

*008 sticks his gun into his belt and begins to climb out onto the hood of the car.*

009: Um, G?

008: Relax, I know what I'm doing! 002, 003, see if you can get him to come down and say hi!

002: What the hell for?

008: Just trust me!

*003 and 002 share a glance.*

*008 ducks as explosions go off, nearly knockling him off the car. He looks down at 009.*

008: Just hold it steady!

009: Got it!

[Joyce Carrington]

*009 tries to hold the wheel as steady as possible*

009 (to 004): Honey, I'm going to need a LOT of blended Scotch when this is over!

*004 sighs*

009: Sorry, you'll have to get it out of your secret closet behind the sofa.

004: HEY! You're not supposed to know that!

[Genrewriter]

*008 balances himself on the hood as the helicopter hovers above them. 002 shoots at the kitties as 003 fires at the underbelly of the chopper. The helicopter swerves and begins to come down towards them.*

008: Perfect!

*008 smiles and reaches out for the strut.*

002: What are you doing?

008: Something that will seem really stupid at first!

003: Oh, don't sell yourself short. This is the dumbest thing I've ever seen you do!

002: What about the time he blew up the office?

003: OK, so its a tie.

*008 tenses up and leaps onto the strut, hanging on with one arm and one leg. He fires into the cockpit, causing the helicopter to veer off. 009 stops the car as the chopper ascends.*

009: Oh great.

*008 keeps firing into the cockpit until a goon kicks at him. The man has a black shirt with an eyepatch design on the right sleeve. He yells at 008 as 008 trips him up and climbs into the chopper as smoke begins to pour out of it. The men exchange punches until the goon grabs an explosive kitty. 008 spin-kicks the cat into the goon's mouth and leaps out as the kitty explodes. He drops to the ground and rolls to a stop as 009 drives up.*

009: Showoff.

*008 stands as the helicopter crashes in a huge fireball.*

009: You find anything when you decided to use that thing as a jungle gym?

008: Yeah, it's the cat alright. I recorded the goon's voice on my watch-recorder-

004: Watch-recorder?

008: New prototype, not perfected yet.

003: Figures.

008: Anyhow, I couldn't make out what he was saying but someone else might be able to.

*003 glances over at Asiaq.*

003: I think I know somebody.

*008 nods and gets back into the car.*

004: So, I guess you handled that guy pretty well, huh?

008: I made him eat-

002: Don't even say it.

*008 shrugs as 009 throws the car into drive and speeds off.*

[Bryce (003)]

Can we please get ourselves and our guest back to the hotel?

*Bryce checks Asiaq's pulse*

She's resting. Nicely done all...I do pick the best vacation spots....

*thinks*

*passes out anti-toxin injectors to all*

Just in cast the cats were "carrying" anything.

*looks to 008*

I'll give you a 9.5 overall, but your form is only worth an 8. Bloody well done though!