25 replies to this topic

[Capt.Sir Dominic Flandry]

My Casino Royale review


It only seems like yesterday that Daniel Craig paddled down the Thames and was pushed out of his dinghy in a rubber-ring by Michael G Wilson. I was thrilled because Daniel Craig has always been my favourite actor. When I say favourite actor I'm not being entirely truthful. To be honest I had no idea who he was. But anyway he was the new James Bond. He seemed a bit short for the role and his fair hair and craggy features seemed better suited to a Robin Askwith biopic than tall, dark and handsome 007. For some reason he was wearing enough eyeliner to stock a small beauty saloon. But anyway he was James Bond. He looked a bit scrawny at the press conference but when shooting began he seemed to have packed two years worth of body-building into three months. He looks like he can kill or do some damage said his supporters. Why has he done all that body-building? said the sceptics. He looks like even more of a shortarse now. But anyway he was the new James Bond. As more footage from the film was released positions became more entrenched. I became more pessimistic with every new terrible photo of Daniel Craig and his one facial expression. On the plus side I was relieved to see someone had given the poor man some eyebrows. On the minus side he looked a bit like Roger De Courcey without Nookie the Bear. But anyway he was the new James Bond.



You could tell that old Bigmouth himself, the reliably unimaginative Martin Campbell was directing the new James Bond film. He managed to insult the other Bond actors before he'd finished. After proudly trumpeting the fact that Casino Royale would feature a 28-year-old Bond who has just earned his Double-O status he ended up with 53 year-old Daniel Craig as his young rookie Bond. The young Bond contenders were just too young he said later. Yes, 22 year-old Henry Cavill was too young to be James Bond. What a turn up for the books. Makes sense really with him only being, you know, 22. Perhaps they should have tested a few more actors who were old enough to shave.

Casino Royale is seventeen hours long. It begins with a B/W sequence and then moves into a title sequence involving a very small Daniel Craig and a theme tune that was rejected by Finland when David Arnold offered it to them as their Eurovision song contest entry. Then we have the free-running sequence which is too long and a bit silly. Yes, Pierce Brosnan is still roasted for his underwater tie-adjustments and radio controlled BMW but Daniel Craig running through walls and jumping off girders is somehow humane and realistic. Then he kills three-hundred soldiers and shoots the man he was chasing for reasons that escape me at the moment. The villain of Casino Royale is Le Chiffre played by the great Madge Nicholson. He wears a black suit and looks a bit oily. And that's it. Vesper is played by the French actress Eva Green. She doesn't have an awful lot to do in this film and her acting skills suggest that wasn't such a bad move.

After the chase we get a lot of product placement and cellphone nonsense. Cell phones received enough screen time to virtually be placed on the cast list. Craig plays cards and drives a Ford Mondeo. Judi Dench gives her 'just happy to be here' performance as M. The Airport sequence, which I feel like I've seen two hundred times in other movies, felt shoehorned in to give the film another set-piece and then we move into Montenegro and the second half of the film. It won't come as a huge suprise to know that I disliked the second half of the film too. Why? In no real order:

1) The Bond/Vesper train sparring was woeful.
2) The poker scenes were drab.
3) Clunky dialogue.
4) Drink wobbling.
5) Drink wobbling.
6) Drink wobbling.
7) Contrived ending.


Daniel Craig in the lead role wanders around looking miserable and talks in a flat, monotone voice. He runs a lot and purses his lips. At no time did I think I was watching James Bond. His looks are laughably wrong for Bond and he lacks charisma, charm and a sense of mischief. I'd rather be locked in a room with a double-glazing salesman than watch Craig's Bond. James Bond is a joyless character in CR. Gone is the escapism and fun, replaced by laborious psychology and dreary production design.

I miss the panache, the wit, the charm of Bond.

[Jim]

Fair enough.

Welcome to CBn.

[Royal Dalton]

On the minus side he looked a bit like Roger De Courcey without Nookie the Bear.

There was a bit of Nookie in the film, though.

[dinovelvet]

You could tell that old Bigmouth himself, the reliably unimaginative Martin Campbell was directing the new James Bond film. He managed to insult the other Bond actors before he'd finished.

When did that happen? (And what exactly has Campbell done to earn the moniker 'old Bigmouth'...?)

OHHHHH! I get it! This is one of them 'funny' reviews, right?

[jaguar007]

Sounds like Moo Moo might be back

[Bryce (003)]

Well Capt., to each their own, but, I disagree.

Now, somebody go milk the cow.

Nice of you to say hello Moo...But you could be a bit more original.

...Considerably.

*shrugs*

[Major Tallon]

My Casino Royale review

I miss the panache, the wit, the charm of Bond.

Yes, I'm afraid that you did.

[Bryce (003)]

My Casino Royale review

I miss the panache, the wit, the charm of Bond.

Yes, I'm afraid that you did.

LOL! Major.

*salutes*

[DaveBond21]

On the minus side he looked a bit like Roger De Courcey without Nookie the Bear.

I admit it would have been great if Nookie the Bear had been in Casino Royale!!Thanks for reminding me of one of my childhood favourites.

[Tarl_Cabot]

I didn't agree with the hyperbole laden review but it was entertaining at least. Welcome to CBN.

[jaguar007]

I love the fresh smell of moo moo in the morning!

[Germanlady]

I do wonder, though, for how long those - hm, what the h*** do I title this? - are gonna creep up. Probably as long as it takes to make Bond 22. But since those "Things" (Hurray, got a name)can

[jake speed]

I love the fresh smell of moo moo in the morning!

Isn't Bondfan American? I don't think Nookie the bear ever caught on over there.

[the villain's architect]

troll.

[Bondian]

I love the fresh smell of moo moo in the morning!

Yeah. It's more aromatic than just coffee and goats milk.

He's a real 'hoofer' with his IP Addresses I should imagine.

This is the chappie of the topic title.

http://www.rogerdecourcey.co.uk/

I'd hate to have a career whereby some elderley balding man has his hand permanently inserted into my buttocks and beyond. Surely he could sue for 'occupational hazard'.

[sharpshooter]

I strongly disagree with what you say Capt.

Are you a Bond fan or what?

[triviachamp]

I love the fresh smell of moo moo in the morning!

Isn't Bondfan American? I don't think Nookie the bear ever caught on over there.

He's British so he would have heard of this Nookie bear show.

[00Twelve]

Captain,

I'm gonna call you Dom.

Dom,

I hereby renounce your knighthood and am demoting you to Junior Grade Lieutenant.

Now, go and swab the deck, Lieutenant Flandry.

[dodge]

My Casino Royale review


It only seems like yesterday that Daniel Craig paddled down the Thames and was pushed out of his dinghy in a rubber-ring by Michael G Wilson. I was thrilled because Daniel Craig has always been my favourite actor. When I say favourite actor I'm not being entirely truthful. To be honest I had no idea who he was. But anyway he was the new James Bond. He seemed a bit short for the role and his fair hair and craggy features seemed better suited to a Robin Askwith biopic than tall, dark and handsome 007. For some reason he was wearing enough eyeliner to stock a small beauty saloon. But anyway he was James Bond. He looked a bit scrawny at the press conference but when shooting began he seemed to have packed two years worth of body-building into three months. He looks like he can kill or do some damage said his supporters. Why has he done all that body-building? said the sceptics. He looks like even more of a shortarse now. But anyway he was the new James Bond. As more footage from the film was released positions became more entrenched. I became more pessimistic with every new terrible photo of Daniel Craig and his one facial expression. On the plus side I was relieved to see someone had given the poor man some eyebrows. On the minus side he looked a bit like Roger De Courcey without Nookie the Bear. But anyway he was the new James Bond.



You could tell that old Bigmouth himself, the reliably unimaginative Martin Campbell was directing the new James Bond film. He managed to insult the other Bond actors before he'd finished. After proudly trumpeting the fact that Casino Royale would feature a 28-year-old Bond who has just earned his Double-O status he ended up with 53 year-old Daniel Craig as his young rookie Bond. The young Bond contenders were just too young he said later. Yes, 22 year-old Henry Cavill was too young to be James Bond. What a turn up for the books. Makes sense really with him only being, you know, 22. Perhaps they should have tested a few more actors who were old enough to shave.

Casino Royale is seventeen hours long. It begins with a B/W sequence and then moves into a title sequence involving a very small Daniel Craig and a theme tune that was rejected by Finland when David Arnold offered it to them as their Eurovision song contest entry. Then we have the free-running sequence which is too long and a bit silly. Yes, Pierce Brosnan is still roasted for his underwater tie-adjustments and radio controlled BMW but Daniel Craig running through walls and jumping off girders is somehow humane and realistic. Then he kills three-hundred soldiers and shoots the man he was chasing for reasons that escape me at the moment. The villain of Casino Royale is Le Chiffre played by the great Madge Nicholson. He wears a black suit and looks a bit oily. And that's it. Vesper is played by the French actress Eva Green. She doesn't have an awful lot to do in this film and her acting skills suggest that wasn't such a bad move.

After the chase we get a lot of product placement and cellphone nonsense. Cell phones received enough screen time to virtually be placed on the cast list. Craig plays cards and drives a Ford Mondeo. Judi Dench gives her 'just happy to be here' performance as M. The Airport sequence, which I feel like I've seen two hundred times in other movies, felt shoehorned in to give the film another set-piece and then we move into Montenegro and the second half of the film. It won't come as a huge suprise to know that I disliked the second half of the film too. Why? In no real order:

1) The Bond/Vesper train sparring was woeful.
2) The poker scenes were drab.
3) Clunky dialogue.
4) Drink wobbling.
5) Drink wobbling.
6) Drink wobbling.
7) Contrived ending.


Daniel Craig in the lead role wanders around looking miserable and talks in a flat, monotone voice. He runs a lot and purses his lips. At no time did I think I was watching James Bond. His looks are laughably wrong for Bond and he lacks charisma, charm and a sense of mischief. I'd rather be locked in a room with a double-glazing salesman than watch Craig's Bond. James Bond is a joyless character in CR. Gone is the escapism and fun, replaced by laborious psychology and dreary production design.

I miss the panache, the wit, the charm of Bond.

Yes, but your review is 10 million words long--and CR went by a lot faster! Welcome, anyway.

[Judo chop]

Casino Royale is seventeen hours long.

Yes, but your review is 10 million words long--and CR went by a lot faster! Welcome, anyway.

Now wait a second here... before we all start to pull out the carpet beaters, there may be some truth to this. Is the Extended Edition of the DVD out?!

[Mr_Wint]

My Casino Royale review


It only seems like yesterday that Daniel Craig paddled down the Thames and was pushed out of his dinghy in a rubber-ring by Michael G Wilson. I was thrilled because Daniel Craig has always been my favourite actor. When I say favourite actor I'm not being entirely truthful. To be honest I had no idea who he was. But anyway he was the new James Bond. He seemed a bit short for the role and his fair hair and craggy features seemed better suited to a Robin Askwith biopic than tall, dark and handsome 007. For some reason he was wearing enough eyeliner to stock a small beauty saloon. But anyway he was James Bond. He looked a bit scrawny at the press conference but when shooting began he seemed to have packed two years worth of body-building into three months. He looks like he can kill or do some damage said his supporters. Why has he done all that body-building? said the sceptics. He looks like even more of a shortarse now. But anyway he was the new James Bond. As more footage from the film was released positions became more entrenched. I became more pessimistic with every new terrible photo of Daniel Craig and his one facial expression. On the plus side I was relieved to see someone had given the poor man some eyebrows. On the minus side he looked a bit like Roger De Courcey without Nookie the Bear. But anyway he was the new James Bond.



You could tell that old Bigmouth himself, the reliably unimaginative Martin Campbell was directing the new James Bond film. He managed to insult the other Bond actors before he'd finished. After proudly trumpeting the fact that Casino Royale would feature a 28-year-old Bond who has just earned his Double-O status he ended up with 53 year-old Daniel Craig as his young rookie Bond. The young Bond contenders were just too young he said later. Yes, 22 year-old Henry Cavill was too young to be James Bond. What a turn up for the books. Makes sense really with him only being, you know, 22. Perhaps they should have tested a few more actors who were old enough to shave.

Casino Royale is seventeen hours long. It begins with a B/W sequence and then moves into a title sequence involving a very small Daniel Craig and a theme tune that was rejected by Finland when David Arnold offered it to them as their Eurovision song contest entry. Then we have the free-running sequence which is too long and a bit silly. Yes, Pierce Brosnan is still roasted for his underwater tie-adjustments and radio controlled BMW but Daniel Craig running through walls and jumping off girders is somehow humane and realistic. Then he kills three-hundred soldiers and shoots the man he was chasing for reasons that escape me at the moment. The villain of Casino Royale is Le Chiffre played by the great Madge Nicholson. He wears a black suit and looks a bit oily. And that's it. Vesper is played by the French actress Eva Green. She doesn't have an awful lot to do in this film and her acting skills suggest that wasn't such a bad move.

After the chase we get a lot of product placement and cellphone nonsense. Cell phones received enough screen time to virtually be placed on the cast list. Craig plays cards and drives a Ford Mondeo. Judi Dench gives her 'just happy to be here' performance as M. The Airport sequence, which I feel like I've seen two hundred times in other movies, felt shoehorned in to give the film another set-piece and then we move into Montenegro and the second half of the film. It won't come as a huge suprise to know that I disliked the second half of the film too. Why? In no real order:

1) The Bond/Vesper train sparring was woeful.
2) The poker scenes were drab.
3) Clunky dialogue.
4) Drink wobbling.
5) Drink wobbling.
6) Drink wobbling.
7) Contrived ending.


Daniel Craig in the lead role wanders around looking miserable and talks in a flat, monotone voice. He runs a lot and purses his lips. At no time did I think I was watching James Bond. His looks are laughably wrong for Bond and he lacks charisma, charm and a sense of mischief. I'd rather be locked in a room with a double-glazing salesman than watch Craig's Bond. James Bond is a joyless character in CR. Gone is the escapism and fun, replaced by laborious psychology and dreary production design.

I miss the panache, the wit, the charm of Bond.

Decent review. I think you make some really good points here but at the same time you totally ignore what works in the film (like Craig's performance and the improved writing).

[EL7]

Wierd... I saw the movie then read the book, for the first time and now I'm on the 5th. I think this Bond is far more what the books had in mind...

Daniel Craig looked miserable? Well the Bond in the books wasn't walking about happy IMO. From thinking about his file in different governments hands to fearing the flight he took in LALD, who wouldn't be miserable, life as a 00 is hard.

His looks laughably wrong? I had a look at the actor Ian Flemming compaired him too, actually there's a odd resemblence, in the nose and ears at least. Not super handsome either....

As for charm, sence of mischef, he still has the charm and the mischef was there, his word play with Vesper and the parking lot scene....

As for escapism, not cartoony like the other films but who isn't daydreaming of being Daniel Craig's Bond? I mean who wouldn't love to have a license to kill all the bad guys you want without having to answer for it and play poker with your governments money? Seems to be a realistic escape if I ever heard of one...

Oh, and the airport scene done in other movies? Well there's been 20 Bond movies done the same so.....

[Jericho_One]

I love the fresh smell of moo moo in the morning!

Yeah, it smells like bull!

[DaveBond21]

They should bring back Nookie Bear though....

[Sbott]

They should bring back Nookie Bear though....

Absolutely what a star Nookie Bear once was!

[DaveBond21]

Is he still going?

A lot of kids entertainers from the 1980s have gone onto the college circuit with adult versions of their TV shows!!!